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What would you say if your father in law emails your hubby, asking him"how is he doing and the baby?" but he never asks the proper way which is "how are you all doing"? so its like he's acting like you don't exist isnt that messed up?

So to be sarcastic back we put "well dad how are you and davy doing?" which davy is the lil dog he's got, and he replied by saying "well the same as you and your cats." what do u think about that? I was hoping for him to catch it and start asking from now on the proper way "how are you and your family doing" but I guess my f.i.l is to ignorant. He makes me feel like i'm not important or something, what should my hubby write back?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:55 PM on Nov. 16, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • I think the only thing that you can do is ask your husband to talk with him.
    Your husband married YOU. He loves YOU. That also means that he needs to go to bat for you.
    Hopefully it is just an oversight and your FIL is not aware he is doing that.
    Good Luck Mama!
    Serendipitydoo

    Answer by Serendipitydoo at 11:56 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • I have great in laws and my father in law inquires about us all and we chat just to chat. I believe I would feel hurt if he didn't ask. Does he seem to not like you or can you tell there is some kind of problem he has with you? I know my one sister in law my father in law doesn't get along with. They just don't connect is a better way to put it. So he barely ask about her, Not because he hates her. Just like I don't always ask my sister about her husband and I feel bad later and have made more of an appoint to ask. Sorry if this doesn't help
    momofangels5

    Answer by momofangels5 at 12:00 AM on Nov. 17, 2008

  • Are there other issues going on? Is there a reason he doesn't ask how you are?
    Is there a bad history with the 2 of you?
    My father in law is 72 years old and honestly, it wouldn't hurt my feelings at all if he didn't ask about me. I'm lucky he still remembers to ask how the kids are. And sometimes he actually doesn't ask about anyone. Something like that is small stuff to me and I don't sweat the small stuff. I KNOW my fil loves me and if he doesn't ask about me, so be it!
    BrendaMomOf3

    Answer by BrendaMomOf3 at 12:06 AM on Nov. 17, 2008

  • My F.I.L never asks me how im doing, not even to my face when viviting. So I have just gotten used to it. not my prob. I dont ask him either. So whatever. At least your DH is willing to make an effort to get his dad to acknowledge you as well. Thats really good. My DH doesnt at.

    At least I have amazing parents of my own that even send DH B-Day Cards and and encouraging letters personly for him. Lets just say i wish my inlaws were just like them because it would feel really good. But ehh. I dont and I have to get over it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:07 AM on Nov. 17, 2008

  • "brendamomof3" My f.i.l is 50 so he has no excuse of forgetting to ask about any of us, and no I've never given him a reason to hate me but I just get the vibe like he doesnt like me because I dont flirt with him or dress slutty like the girlfriends of my bro in law do and thats what he wants, but I just think that he should grow up and ask the muture way "how are you and the family doing" and get over the sluts.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:40 AM on Nov. 17, 2008

  • Don't take it personal he was just going along with the sarcasism.
    Next time just ask how he is doing. Or you email him and have some kind of daughter in law bond with him then he will react the way you want him. If you don't talk to him only when hubby does then he might think you don't want to talk to him just be yourself and say hi and the I love you's or we love you and you will see the difference.
    Butterfly1108

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 12:43 PM on Nov. 17, 2008

  • ok i go thru this same thing i know how i feels but your hubby should say well my wife is doing just fine and you how r you?i live with my father in law i know no privacy

    but you should talk to him about
    if you want to chat heres my email gre_ac@hotmail.com
    GRECIANTONY

    Answer by GRECIANTONY at 2:48 PM on Feb. 26, 2009

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