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Does anybody think a "bring your own pizza" party is rude?

First of all, I'd never heard of one before until some relatives across the state had one. Keep in mind my husband and I have an 8 month old, my sister has three kids and no husband to help her with them (and her 5 year old is autistic), my brother has 4 kids, one of whom is under a month old. We were invited to a "bring your own pizza" party by relatives across the state who all live close to each other. As the party was to honor my grandparents, who are aging rapidly, we all were obligated to go. Stopping to pick up pizza in an unfamiliar town with a grouchy baby who's been in the car for two hours was absolute HELL!! I can't even imagine what my sister went through with her kids, all of whom are normally horribly behaved anyway, never mind hungry after a two hour car ride. We wouldn't have minded paying somebody back if they ordered pizza, and always have put in money in the past whenever there has been an order out situation. I just think it was horribly rude of the person who organized the event to decide that this was a good way of doing it. Oh, and by the way, we all brought pizza and half of the people who lived within a mile of the actual venue didn't. Guess who's pizza they ate? Ya-huh!!
We have another "bring your own pizza" party scheduled for this weekend, thank God only half as far (only a half hour ride for us, an hour for the rest of the family) with the other side of the family. We have already planned ahead and had one person (my dad) made responsible for the ordering of the pizza and we will all chip in money as we arrive. When did this custom start? I don't remember ever doing it this way before.... I understand that in the past some people have paid for the pizza and not been paid back by some of the people at the event, so we are taking it upon ourselves to purchase our own pizza.
Another question, maybe it should be separate but it is on subject...What do we do when people start to eat the pizza we have all paid for? They are all family, but if they wanted to do the party this way they shoulda brought their own. Keeping in mind we are not by any stretch a rich family. Actually, this will be the first pizza my husband and I have had since the other party last summer. We are saving for a house and will need a bigger car soon ( I have a 2 door cavalier and a second baby on the way. Not too much fun with one car seat, never mind 2 ) and don't have any money to throw around on take out food. But this is a family event and we are happy to do it this time.

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Robbiesmommy83

Asked by Robbiesmommy83 at 8:19 PM on Feb. 8, 2011 in Entertainment

Level 12 (765 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • i think its rude. if someone is throwing an event, and they want food to be there, then they need to provide it otherwise just have side dishes, chips dip veggies etc.
    MomNbabyGirl009

    Answer by MomNbabyGirl009 at 8:25 PM on Feb. 8, 2011

  • That is kinda strange; I've never heard of that. Being the person I am, I would ask the people who don't bring their own if they forgot or are chipping in on mine. I probably wouldn't share with the adults who don't buy their own for no good reason, but no kid goes without.
    silversmom

    Answer by silversmom at 8:29 PM on Feb. 8, 2011

  • I've never heard of anyone doing that. Personally I think its rude, especially if everyone isn't contributing. Can you talk to whoever is organizing this thing and come up with something else, maybe a traditional pot luck instead?
    Scuba

    Answer by Scuba at 8:35 PM on Feb. 8, 2011

  • I would be ticked... sounds like a pizza pot puck and no one likes the people who mooch in reg. potluck situations.
    MoMoFu

    Answer by MoMoFu at 8:43 PM on Feb. 8, 2011

  • You know, we always used to do potluck dinners and always had way more food than we could all eat. My mom made the most amazing mac and cheese that has become a family legend, and all of us brought potato salad, fruit salad, meatballs, chicken wings, and every other yummy thing you could think of. However, this event is organized by my dad's sisters ( all 4 of them!) and they really want to do it this way. It's being held at a small hall where my grandmother lives ( its her 80th birthday party) and they just don't want to make food for as many people as will be there. My dad's brother traditionally doesn't bring anything except his fat wife and 6 fat kids, all of whom are rude, loud, and between the ages of 24 and 16 ( so not babies). They usually gravitate over to where our family is sitting because we tend to bring the best food, and I have a strong feeling they are going to be the ones horning in on our pizza.
    Robbiesmommy83

    Comment by Robbiesmommy83 (original poster) at 8:46 PM on Feb. 8, 2011

  • I have never heard of such a thing before, and I think it's rude to ask out-of-towners to try to stop somewhere to pick up a pizza! I've always thought that if you are hosting something, you should provide the entree' as it were (meat, or the big meal, etc.) and let everyone else bring sides. I understand the obligation is usually a little steeper when it's family, especially if it's an event being thrown for parents, grandparents, etc., but allow those from out of town to chip in financially instead of schlepping something across state lines or trying to find a store in an unfamiliar town!
    hrh.sassypants

    Answer by hrh.sassypants at 8:48 PM on Feb. 8, 2011

  • Well, right now everyone's money is probably tight, and they can't afford to buy pizza for everyone and not be reimbursed and since it's a gathering to visit your grandparents and not a party, party (like birthday, anniversary) then I think this is a good way to do it. Being one of the people who have been stiffed often, I wouldn't want to put money out I may or may not get back. As for people eating pizza they didn't pay for? Put your name on it and if you see someone in your box let them know it's yours. I find eating pizza you didn't pay for at an event that is BYOP is far more rude!
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 9:03 PM on Feb. 8, 2011

  • rude, and I wouldnt do it, go to the party, and go out to eat before, and tell the moochers, "sorry, I didnt feel like pizza today, we already ate"
    shivasgirl

    Answer by shivasgirl at 12:26 AM on Feb. 9, 2011

  • It sounds to me like a potluck dinner, and the only difference is everyone is supposed to bring a pizza. I don't see a problem!!
    Bethsunshine

    Answer by Bethsunshine at 12:59 PM on Feb. 18, 2011

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