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I get my 3 year old Grandson every other weekend and he is potty trained as far as urinating is concerned but when it comes to having a bowel movement we can not get him to do it in the toilet only in his pull ups. Any suggestions on how we can help him not be afraid of going in the toilet?

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Asked by weewarrior at 8:54 AM on Nov. 17, 2008 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (8)
  • He may be scared of the splash of water that comes up and hits his little bum. You may want to put some toilet paper in the toilet first so that it will absorb the sound and splash. My son decided to go after he saw that it was not going to get him. Good Luck but don't force him it would just make it worse.

    Answer by SusanReeves at 7:54 AM on Nov. 18, 2008

  • yep. I potty trained my son by just putting him in underwear. I also potty trained him sitting down not standing up so he wouldnt get confused.

    Answer by lowencope at 9:23 PM on Nov. 17, 2008

  • My nephew was that way. He would pee in the potty but when he had to poop. He would ask my sister for a pull-up or go get one and but it on. So one day my sister hide the pull-ups so when he had to poop. He had to go to the potty or in his underwear. I know it sounds mean, but he learned that day that the potty was for pee and poop.

    Answer by momgriff at 9:15 PM on Nov. 17, 2008

  • The only think that worked was to show my son where the poop goes.
    For instance everytime he poops bring him to the bathroom with you and with a soft voice tell him where the poop goes and throw the poop from the pull up in the toilet... at some point he will just poop there.

    Answer by Paty_hotmommy at 4:06 PM on Nov. 17, 2008

  • My son would pee in the toilet, but he wouldn't sit on it, so he would poo in his potty chair for the longest time. I finally started having him dump it into the toilet and flush it, so he could see there was nothing to be afraid of. Then he finally sat on it after a little while of that, and I let him look at books to distract him. Didn't take too long for him to get used to it. I've heard it's a very bad idea to push them if they're afraid, it will just make it worse. That happened with my nephew! He got to be terrified just to go into the bathroom. :(

    Answer by mom2XandZ at 3:18 PM on Nov. 17, 2008

  • My younger boy was like that. What I did when he pooped in the pull up was take him in the bathroom and dumped the poop in the toilet and flushed it down. I did that for a couple days then let him flush it down. I also let him join me while going and let him look and flush. He got used to the idea this way. Saw that nothing happend and his fear subsided.
    My son would hide too, even before potty training started he liked privacy

    Answer by perksmom at 11:06 AM on Nov. 17, 2008

  • I have read that it is very common for children to be scared to have a bowel in the toilet. I would look for maybe some fun potty training videos for him to watch. My daughter was givin one of those it came with songs and problem solving tips, other then that just a lot of encouragement. Usually if they do it a few times in the toilet they get over the fear. I know I would watch for the first sign of her getting ready too and we would run to the toilet, most of the time we failed but it only took once and we made a huge song and dance and clapping hands deal about it ,she would tell us everytime after that while running for the bathroom. :)

    Answer by Izzyscrazymom at 9:07 AM on Nov. 17, 2008

  • This is so common with little boys. I was a nanny for a child that NEVER liked having a BM on the tiolet. To the point he would be in pain, go hide in a corner, and have show downs with his parents. My brother had a similar problem but a little more severe. He had so much build up that he had fecal matter the size of a brick in his intestines. His doctor told my mother mineral oil (I don't know if that is still done), bran muffins, and a few poop friendly foods. We used sugar free ice creme on the little boy I nannied. Sugar free products have sorbital and it is a poop friendly food. He ate a lot of it, couldn't hold it in, and we would rush him to the tiolet. This was just to get him used to going on the tiolet. Asking his doctor for advice is always a good thing. No worries though, he won't be 16 and still going in his pull ups.

    Answer by frogdawg at 9:04 AM on Nov. 17, 2008

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