You know what I am very confused on this issue. I am a stepmom. I have been told several times I have no business watching him or taking care of him while my husband is away. That is he isn't my child. That I have no rights no punish him or anything a mother would do. BUT then I see on here when stepmoms complain about their stepchildren people say well you married both the man and his kids. You need to be a mother to those kids. Which one is it? We are told we can't be their mother then we are told we have to be their mother.
We are called stepMOMS for a reason. My stepsons mom has taught him to call me mommy. Says it's okay to punish him when needed. wants me to act like I am his real mom.
So my question is which will it be? Why can't we be moms to our stepchildren but yet we have to act like moms to them?
Like everyone says we married both the man and his children. If we have no rights ( i am not talking legally) to them then why do they all us stepMOMs?
We are allowed to love them and teach them but we aren't allowed to punish them when they break the rules. We are allowed to only be around them when their father is around. We aren't allowed to watch them when he isn't around.
Answer by mysticlady1221 at 6:28 PM on Feb. 12, 2011
Answer by autbot at 8:35 PM on Feb. 9, 2011
Answer by princessbeth79 at 8:40 PM on Feb. 9, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 10:04 PM on Feb. 9, 2011
Answer by frogdawg at 10:23 AM on Feb. 10, 2011
Answer by layh41407 at 9:20 PM on Feb. 9, 2011
Answer by Proverbs_31 at 11:30 PM on Feb. 9, 2011
Answer by CnMe31 at 12:34 AM on Feb. 10, 2011
We both agree that our dd step parents will get a lot more say than most other people in her life, but they are not the original parent and that if there are any problems my ex and I are going to be the ones to work it out and make the choices for our child.
This agreement would not work for a lot of people, but it works for us we both have been upfront with the people we have relationships with if they get serious and tell them how we have it worked out. They knew going in your not going to get called mommy or daddy and if there is a difference in opinions on parenting that they need to take it up with the one they are with and not the other parent. No stepdad fighting with dad or stepmom and mom fighting it out. They can voice their opinion and if it needs dealing with My ex and I talk it out. Everysituation though needs to be worked out in a way that it works for everyone.
Answer by Alanaplus3 at 8:45 AM on Feb. 10, 2011
Answer by KennsWifey at 10:13 AM on Feb. 10, 2011