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Why am I finding little things that bother me about my SO?

My SO and I have only been dating for a few months.. and now ive found myself picking him apart. I'm just starting to find little things about him that bother me. I remember thinking that he was absolutely perfect when we first started dating.. but now im finding little faults. Why am I doing this? And what can this mean?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:34 AM on Feb. 11, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • It means you have the right guy but you are never going to be happy because you are looking for "absolutely perfect"...which doesn't exist.

    Or, you are really not that happy with this person and creating a way to justify leaving him.

    Answer by spottedpony at 1:40 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • Maybe you're together too much. Sometimes we can feel smothered and just need some alone time.

    Answer by Kathy675 at 1:44 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • Are you pregnant ?? I always seem to get a little on edge when Im pregnant lol thats how I knew I was pregnant with my 2nd

    Answer by mommato2boys79 at 2:13 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • Wow i have done this very thing, before marrying my SO, but we did split for a short time bc i was picking at him so much.... However we did spend quite a bit of time n night lol heres what i did that helped me. I made a little list of those things(that bothered me, 1 being the one that bothered me most.. I then shared the list with a guidance counselor, reason i chose him, is because i knew he would neutral..(and helpful as possible) If i would have used my bff she would have said kick him to the curb.. We talked the things, how they affected me and my feelings. He (the counselor) wanted to know my reaction, to those things if any... we discussed ways to iron them out.. without giving the ultimatum "Change this or else" lol Keep in mind he has never laid a hand on me or threatened me in any way. I love my DH. Im glad i took the time to listen to that counselor. =) GL

    Answer by sarachelle1883 at 6:01 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • I think sometimes when things are going good we start looking for little things so that we can say, "Well this isn't going to work because of XYZ" I know for me it was hard to think that someone could care about me with all my faults and flaws. Also I had been in a bad relationship before my SO and I got together so I was afraid. When we first got together it took a long time for me except things. My DH is not perfect and he does have things that bother me, although after 16 years together I have learned how to live with them and deal with them.

    Try to see if these little things are really a big deal or if they are just bothering you because you are afraid this person migt be the one and you are scared of that.

    Good Luck!

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 6:42 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • People who think things are too good to be true usually pick it apart. Were you hurt in the past?? If so, then maybe you're trying to find reasons to push him away. You need to rake some time and figure out if it really annoys you or if you;re trying to hard to be annoyed. And I agree, perfect doesn't exist..

    Answer by gutterflower585 at 8:12 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

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