Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Would you let your husband go?

My step children are flying to see us this summer. The youngest is too young to fly alone, even with his sister, so an adult has to accompany them on their flight back home. My husband wants to fly back with them. I wouldnt really mind, but seeing as though his ex will be there to get them at the gate, makes me feel weird. Kind of like a family reuinion type deal. It would be her alone, and just him and the kids. I am NOT comfortable with this idea. I told him about it, and he said that fine I could fly back with them. Great. Thats what I think I want to do.

And to add, he said that sending me with them would be a good idea so he wouldnt have to miss work...


Am I being stupid about this?

How would he feel if I flew back with my kids, and it was my ex greeting me at the gate, and it was kind of like a family reunion type deal?

Call me jealous, insecure. I already know I am. lol

So. Should I fly back with them? Or let him?

My insecurity is HER. My step daughter told us how much her mother and her new "step dad" (they arent married yet) fight all the time. And I believe she may be unhappy. I dont know. When we went to see them for Christmas she acted so insanely jealous of my husband and I. I truly believe that if he told her today that he wanted to be with her again, she would jump on the opportunity. I just dont really trust HER with my husband.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:00 AM on Feb. 11, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (22)
  • Just let him go...if he wanted to be with her he would be with her. He picked you, they are the childrens parents. It's not a big deal if he sees ex without u.
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 11:01 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • The Ex is always going to be in his life and she is is EX for a reason.
    Misteh

    Answer by Misteh at 11:01 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • I can definitely see why you may be concerned. I think the fact that he offered to just let you go says a lot!! It doesn't seem like he has any other motives.. I think the most healthy thing for a child is for there parents to get a long... Especially, if there not together. And if you think about it what could really happen with the kids there anyway?? Is he flying right back after he gets them there?
    mandyh0319

    Answer by mandyh0319 at 11:03 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • She is his EX wife, correct? At some point they decided that they didn't want to be together, right? I mean, you two should do what you think is best between you, but I think your jealousy is pointless in this case.
    misses_nick

    Answer by misses_nick at 11:03 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • It sounds like you have some insecurities here.

    It is NOT like a family reunion. He is dropping off his kids and making sure that they are safe until they are with their mom. End of story.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 11:04 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • Why not just let him go. It would give him more time with his kids. Is ex will always be in his life because of the kids so you are going to have to get use to it.
    KWnavywife

    Answer by KWnavywife at 11:04 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • I would let him go. You can't ask him to have his children fly alone and think of the added expense just for you to go along. Unless you want to go along and make some kind of mini vacation out of it. Then you don't seem like you don't trust him and you guys get some fun out of it.
    ConcernedMom141

    Answer by ConcernedMom141 at 11:04 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • Jealousy can also break up a marriage, let him go his kids need him, not you.
    gammie

    Answer by gammie at 11:05 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • I understand,but she is not a threat to your happiness with him. Let him go. U need to trust him. Can't have a marriage without trust.
    dancer

    Answer by dancer at 11:12 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • If it were me I would not make a big deal out of it, she is an 'ex' for a reason and he obviously has moved on with his life as he is married to you now. If you really don't feel good about him going and seeing her (or if you don't trust her ) when they exchange the kids-- then you have 2 choices you can either take his place and do the kid exchange yourself, OR you can both go and do the kid exchange. That way the 2 of you can be together and you can be a united family front when picking up and dropping off kids. If you both go maybe you can make it a little mini-vacation and after you drop the kids have some 'alone' time together.
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 11:13 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN