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Do you think a worrier can become a non worrier?

I have always been a bit of a worrier, but now that I have a 13 month old daughter, it is even worse. I know I will always worry about her, but I wish I didn't worry about stupid things that I have no control over and even if happened would not be that big a deal. I know in my head that I should just let it go, but I cannot help it. Does anybody have any advice for me.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:49 AM on Feb. 11, 2011 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • It's totally possible. It's about learning self-control in your thoughts. I've actually started using the same kind of distraction that I use on my son on myself!! :) Seriously, it works! When you notice that you start worrying pointlessly, think about something wonderful and real about your child or life. and focus on that until you feel better. Say it out loud and tell your daughter all about what is making you feel better, and force a smile on your face while you are talking. Make a list of "happy things" ahead of time if you need some inspiration in the moment. The more you do it, the more natural this will feel. I know this sounds hokey, but who ever said that kids are the only ones who need to learn how to live right? Learning how to live a happy life is a life-long process. Keep learning and keep becoming a better and better role model for your daughter. Good luck!
    Sebbiemama

    Answer by Sebbiemama at 12:12 PM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • You will learn to worry less as they get older or with each child you have... You may notice with your 2nd baby the things you worried about with your 1st doesn't seem like a big deal this go round.
    SWEETPEAS3MOM

    Answer by SWEETPEAS3MOM at 11:51 AM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • You yourself explained the futile attempt of worrying about things you have no control , why do it? worry will not make anything not happen, but only cause you bad health and anxiety, this is something that can be controlled when you  truly understand why it is futile to continue doing so.

    older

    Answer by older at 12:07 PM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • By the way op, I started off like you too, worrying and realized I can only focus on the things I have control over.....
    older

    Answer by older at 12:09 PM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • I am from a family of worriers, my mom worries a lot as does my sister and I. I worry about my kids a lot but I don't let worrying over take my life or my kid's lives. My sister worried too much she was to the point that she couldn't sleep and was anxious over every situation regarding my niece. She was put on medication and is doing much better. So I think every mother worries but if it interfering with your life than maybe talk to a doctor.

    lilysmom2607

    Answer by lilysmom2607 at 12:10 PM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • Both my DH and my oldest are worriers. A simple exercise of re-framing helps them both, not just in the moment but in general. For example, my son (who is 8) will say "What if I go camping with Cub Scouts and a bear comes to our camp ground?" I say "What if you go camping with Scouts, no bear shows up and you have the time of your life? Which is more likely to happen? Are you willing to give up chance to have that great time -- which is also the most likely outcome - for a bear that will probably never show up?" Sometimes it is mind over matter. My husband will say "I worry that DS is going to be teased." I say to DH "He will. All of us are at some point. But you're going to help him be strong enough to deflect it." Will you stop worrying? Maybe not. BUT, you can change how you dwell on it and what you do about it. It will take work - but you can do it.
    ldmrmom

    Answer by ldmrmom at 12:31 PM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • Definitely. I was a huge worry wart before, but now I have 4 kids, the youngest is almost 4, and over the years I've just gotten less & less worried - stuff doesn't faze me like it used to.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:20 PM on Feb. 11, 2011

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