Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

My husband is a perverted pig. adult content

I just have to get this out. I love my husband, and I would never leave him, but the way he acts sometimes just disgusts me. He has a porography addiction, and he lies to me about it. I have just given up trying to get him to understand or "care" that it hurts my feelings and grosses me out. I feel like he chooses porn over me most of the time. Example: we had a mutual agreement that we weren't going to have sex about a month before we got married. The day before, I went out to go get things situated with the wedding flowers, forgot my phone, and walked in on him watching porn and jacking off while he was supposed to be watching our kids.
As if the porn isn't bad enough, I also have to deal with him galking at other women while we are in public. I dread going to the beach with him or anywhere there are going to be half naked women. Last weekend, we were having dinner with his parents and I cought him making "sexy eyes" with this woman aross the restaurant. She was looking back at him and they were pretty much telling eachother "yeah I wanna fuck you so bad" while I'm sitting right there. I am just so sick of it, and I don't know what to do. YES I have tried talking to him about it, but he just blows it off like I'm insecure. I'm not. I know that I'm a beautiful woman, and there are plenty of men out there that would love to date me, but I don't WANT to flirt and look at other men, and I want y husband to respect me and NOT make me look like a total idiot for being with him when we're in public!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:03 PM on Feb. 11, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Sounds like he's a sex addict. It's nothing personal against you. He needs help.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:06 PM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • ok, you already had kids with him before you married and you wanted to mutually cut sex off before the wedding why? If you knew he had an addiction to pron and was a lecher BEFORE you married him, why did you? You walked into this eyes wide open, either accept him or leave
    shivasgirl

    Answer by shivasgirl at 10:06 PM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • if they had kids before they got married, and then wanted to cute off intercourse before their wedding and they agreed on it.. who cares why.. that doesnt really have anything to do with her concern here.
    & I wouldnt say its nothing personal--its obviously very personal!! im no doctor but a sex addiction, maybe he does have w/ the porn, but eyeing down another female at dinner? that is just RUDE.
    have you tried therapy?
    mohme2three

    Answer by mohme2three at 10:16 PM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • My ex husband was/is a sex addict, after reading your story it was like I was reliving my life over again. Your husband is a sex addict and he needs help like a SAA group and I also recommend you find a COSA group for spouses, SO and family members who are involved w/a sex addict - call 211 and ask for a group near you, believe me, its his problem NOT yours. HUGS!!!
    PatriciaofMN

    Answer by PatriciaofMN at 10:17 PM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • cut** not cute lol
    mohme2three

    Answer by mohme2three at 10:17 PM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • Porn is a bad addition, and i agree that he may have a sex addition, and as far as him making googly eyes at other women in front of you is just rude and disrespectful. I think that he seriously needs therapy or something. Not trying to be rude, but it sounds like he has a serious problem. Especially if he chooses porn over a beautiful woman, in real life!!
    arkelly2188

    Answer by arkelly2188 at 10:20 PM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • he obviously needed some HELP from the professionals... GOOD LUCK !
    inahan

    Answer by inahan at 10:51 PM on Feb. 11, 2011

  • Men are naturally perverted. Welcome to that reality. Some are good at hiding it or ignoring their instincts. But the truth is men like sex and all things sexual. (It keeps the human population going, right). Your SO is probably addicted to porn. It actually changes brain chemistry when a man watches porn all the time. Read up on the subject. There are many helpful websites. It is a hard addiction to overcome actually. But there can be mutual understanding between you both. Find a middle ground. Above all things he should not be lieing to you about it. You are not alone. It is becoming more prevalant that men do this. You don't have to accept it though. Cont...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:53 AM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • Cont...he needs to come to terms with your feelings about it. Its natural for women to worry about their man looking at others. He has to understand that and respect it. It is very unacceptable for him to stare at other women in your presence. Set that boundary with him. Have a frank talk about porn with him. He may not stop all together but he might be able to be totally honest with you (you have to be willing to hear it though) and he can cut back on it, just watch it with you, or whatever you work out. But work it out now before it eats at you any longer!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:59 AM on Feb. 12, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.