Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Would you let bygones be bygones?

A relative of mine has been totally ignoring my e-mails for several months. I had to find out from other relatives just the other day the gender of her unborn baby from another relative. She never e-mailed, called nor IM me like she said she would. She found out the sex an entire month ago! I still haven't heard a single word from her for a very long time. She is purposely shutting me and my girls out completely. She's assuming I am driving 2 hrs away to see baby when born in June just because baby and I are related to us. Why would she expect this out of me when she treats me and my girls like dirt? I think she's only thinking of her selfishness. She/nor her husband hasn't even called, answered any e-mails, nor IM us at all just to say Hi nor ask how we are doing. She doesn't keep in touch since my husband don't welcome her husband in our home. that has nothing to do with my girls nor me. I do not understand her. She wants us to cater to her later on but not until once baby is born like nothing has happened between us but yet completely ignores us? . Would you visit her/baby and give baby gifts or not? I'm debating what to do. i don't want her to think she's able to control me. I don't appreciate the silent treatment towards my girls or I. It's rediculous. I consider them "broke". I don't get either of them. What advice do you have for me. My nephew will be having a b-day party? Should I go even though she treats us as invisible??

Answer Question

Asked by diamondsarecool at 12:34 PM on Feb. 12, 2011 in Relationships

Level 16 (2,942 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • If someone refused to let my husband into their home I would stand by my husband.  And frankly I wouldnt want them at my home either.

    What was the reason your husband wouldnt allowe her husband into your home?


    Answer by Anonymous at 12:36 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • It's her husband's own fault that he isn't welcomed in our home. He put himself in the circumstance.

    Comment by diamondsarecool (original poster) at 12:38 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • They don't welcome my husband in their home either because my husband put him in his place verbally because of her husband's own reactions that is negative..

    Comment by diamondsarecool (original poster) at 12:41 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • That was rather vague. Did the man DO something immoral/illegal... or do the two men simply not get along?

    IF there is an actual reason... Immoral/illegal behavior.... then why bother with them???

    IF the two men simply dont get along and prefer to both act like children... then the two woman can choose to be above it and deal with each other separately from their husbands.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:44 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • the reason is that her husband was disrepectful by sending a very vulgor e-mails and IMs to my husband over the internet that our kids would of read if they saw them. he took that very offensinve. Before that, we had to confront him about him telling people our personal and financial private business. He had no right to do that. We told him to stop and get over being jealous of us. He threatended my husband to come to his home but he coward out when husband offered to meet him half way.

    Comment by diamondsarecool (original poster) at 12:49 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • Ah... so he is a bit of a child. If a woman falls in love with a man who acts like a child... would you expect HER to act like an adult?

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:53 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • no, my husband don't like him since he first met him. he tolerated him for years until he sent disrespect e-mails/IMs to our laptop and threatening him.

    Comment by diamondsarecool (original poster) at 12:55 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • my sister put us in the middle of our husband's scrap.

    Comment by diamondsarecool (original poster) at 12:56 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • What did you do for her to refuse to talk to you? I would honestly think something serious considering no emails, no calls, and so forth... people don't shut you out because you've yet to return their casserole dish??? Hahaha

    Maybe it will simply take you being the bigger person and apologizing for whatever it is? I’m thinking because the rest of the family/friends haven’t told you for up to a month, you all aren’t all that close???

    ~*Wow*~... read your responses... Cut it loose and wait for them to grow up and appologize??? If my kids saw things, knowing ours are in a common area, I'd be pissed too!!! You should be mature enough to respectfully keep trash to yourself... hahaha

    Answer by MommaClark3 at 1:11 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • All i did was tell her my honesty and she dodn't like it. she's in denial. i know the truth and it must hurt her. She did apologize but i don't believe it's sincere because she didn't do anything about hurting my girls feelings. I had to pull teeth with them both for a long time. Kids and I use to be close at one time until her boys physically bullied my girls when they were old enough to know better. they have piss poor parenting skills. they didn't like me nor my husband basically putting them in their places verbally. They consider us "blaming them" to make themselves try to look good. I don't appreciate being accused for making up excuses and using excuses for my misbehavoir because of me having generalized anxiety disorder . They refuse to believe anything I say about it. I'm not going to argue with them. I sent them website facts about my anxiety and they refuse to read and delete the e-mails.I tried.

    Comment by diamondsarecool (original poster) at 1:36 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.