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Do i have a right to be mad?

My fiance goes out all the time. The people that he hangs out with do nothing but stay drunk in a bar, do drugs, and gauk over women. I dont like his friends at all but i dont say anything because its his friends yah kno. But he goes to this bar 3-5 times a week and shoots pool with those guys and i have no idea what goes on. When i call he does not answer and he says his phone was in viberate or he was shooting pool. I dont mind if he goes out like 2 nights a week, but not back to back. He did good this week, he went out onday, and friday, which i am more than ok with, but he told me last night he was not going out tonight because he went out that night and we are running low on money right now and have bills to pay. We both got off of work at 5, and he has been at that bar ever since. Its almost 9 now and he still is not home and wont repsond to my test until like 20 min after i send them. Do i have the right to be mad and say something to him about it?

Answer Question
 
arkelly2188

Asked by arkelly2188 at 8:37 PM on Feb. 12, 2011 in Relationships

Level 14 (1,397 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • if he is putting his buddies ahead of bills you absolutely do
    peanutsmommy1

    Answer by peanutsmommy1 at 8:43 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • well, I wouldn't be tolerating it.....doubt that helps you much, but that's a bit ridiculous....
    FXmomTo3

    Answer by FXmomTo3 at 8:44 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • i agree
    arkelly2188

    Comment by arkelly2188 (original poster) at 8:45 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • If this is how he treats you now and  how irresponsible he is now. I'd really rethink him going from fiance to husband. 

    SweetSprinkles

    Answer by SweetSprinkles at 8:45 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • You have to put your foot down NOW! And tell him what you expect from him. You are his wife. Would he prefere you be someone elses? If you dont like his friends, it's ok you dont have to like them. He's a married man and he's playing the single man's game. Twice a month is enough for him to hang out drinking and playing pool. Imagine how many hundreds of dollars is being wasted each month. How can you save for the future. You'd better get pissed and put your foot down or hes gonna keep thing you don't really mind that much and keep doing the same thing..... and its gonna kepp getting worse if you do nothing about it. How would he like it if you went out 3 days a week and didn't answer his calls? would that be okay with him? You know your dude so find a way to "safely" tell him. I dont want to get you into any "trouble". I am responding so strongly because I resolved a similar situation not to long ago..so I know!
    dbestma

    Answer by dbestma at 8:46 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • I would be thinking about if that is what you want to be married to. Just because you get married does not mean he will change.
    dancinintherain

    Answer by dancinintherain at 8:46 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • ummm...yeah i would be irritated myself. i think you have every right to say something to him about it. and he should understand where you are coming from. i don't think its cool that just cause they are guys they think they could come and go as they please. its like they don't have to think twice about leaving. they think we are there baby sitters. but yet if we wanted to go out like they do, it would be a huge problem. good luck if you do talk to him about it.

    Christieluv0614

    Answer by Christieluv0614 at 8:48 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • If it were me, and it's not, I'd tell him if you like this bar so much have fun, but I'm done with you. It just seems too fishy and shady to me.
    Rosehawk

    Answer by Rosehawk at 8:48 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • He sounds like he is immature and has no idea how to put his family first, so no you arent wrong for being mad. I would be too. It sounds like he is going out alot... I would tell him if I was going to stay with him he had better get his priorities straight, thats just not normal.
    okmommy08

    Answer by okmommy08 at 8:53 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • I Promise, if you Marry him it will get 1000 times Worse! i gave it Everything i had for 7 Long Years with my EX-Husband & he wasn't willing to change until i was walking out of the door- the damage was already done though! You deserve So Much More than this..........

    daisyb

    Answer by daisyb at 11:01 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

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