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4 Bumps

My daughter just turned three and she still isn't listening.

I need some great tips on how to get my daughter to listen to me. She listens to other people, but not me. She will quietly sneak and do things that she knows are bad when I am doing housework or feeding her baby brother. She has her good days, and her bad days. I'm so tired of it!! What on earth can I do to stop this behavior?!

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Asked by LksGutz at 10:00 PM on Feb. 12, 2011 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 2 (6 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Tell her once. Either she obeys or she gets a spanking. It works. All you need be is consistent.

    Answer by NannyB. at 10:05 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • ~*Giggles*~... I went through the same thing with mine... I must have read a ton of parenting books.. tried each thing I read until I figured out what worked with each child... and each child is different!!!

    So glad the local library is FREE

    Answer by MommaClark3 at 10:09 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • all you can do is be on top of her and punish when needed and try to praise often when she's being good. when your feeding the baby have you tried sticking her at a table with a color book and colors or something similar? or get her involved in feeding her little brother. As for the hw, can you work on it during naptime or after she's in bed? I feel for you, my ds has gotten worse since being 3, seemed like just over night a switch was fliped lol

    Answer by dreamangel06 at 10:11 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • If she doesn't listen the first time, enforce time outs or take toys and privileges away..spanking isn't used right off the bat in my House, it is always a last resort - so I suggest doing the same if the others don't work.

    Answer by -AJ at 10:13 PM on Feb. 12, 2011

  • You do NOT need to spank her and most 3 yr olds are NOT going to listen the first time. 3 yr olds are learning to be independent and what they can and cannot get away with. Be patient. Keep her occupied when you need to clean or have her help you clean so she is doing something. Praise all the good that she does. Give her more attention when she is doing good, so she sees that it is better to do good. Clean when she is napping or in bed. Remember that she is 3, not 13. She needs to be taught appropriate behaviors.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 12:48 AM on Feb. 13, 2011

  • I have a 3 year old girl and she, like all preschoolers, will test their limits. I believe in time outs for 3 minutes for her if she disobeys a warning. You have to be really stern and follow-through on what you ask. She actually knows that after I give her a warning and continues to disobey she will get a time out. I count up to three to give her a chance and by 2 she does what i asked. It gets easier with time because there are times when I get down to her level and ask her to behave and she listens. When we go to a store, I let her know if she can have something or if we are not buying anything...believe it or not, at this age they really do understand and you can reason with them if you try to explain the reason behind your actions. Hope this helps...I think if you stick to what you are comfortable with and follow-through with what you say is the consequence, they will begin to respect your authority.

    Answer by ppkt at 12:56 AM on Feb. 13, 2011

  • I feel your pain, I have a 5 and 3 year old. What I do is start by not letting them leave your sight. If I am in the kitchen then they need to be in there too. Don't give her the oppertunity. When she starts to take off, stop her and redirect her to do things you want her to do. Slowly she will start to change her behavior and you will not have her sneeking off. My oldest son is great with rewards. If you do this then you will get a sticker, piece of candy, new toy. I bought some small candies and put them in a bowl and put it in close view when I wanted him to do something I gave it to him promply when the task was completed (be in playing nicely with his brother or picking up toys). My youngest does not do the reward thing he wants things right now. Timeouts work well for him (but I still give him rewards when he does listen). What ever you decide to do, hold to it, be firm. Give praise when she listens. Good Luck!!

    Answer by ChristyW3 at 12:18 PM on Feb. 13, 2011

  • To me, 3 was the toughest age. It does get better, keep being repetitive and firm w/ her. If you say you're going to do something do it. Take somethign away that she likes, TV time, a toy, let her know she can't get away w/ it Good luck!

    Answer by genagina at 9:45 PM on Feb. 13, 2011

  • There's one thing parents need to remember: you ARE the parent. Period. What you says go. Threatening doesn't work. From day one if I said I was going to put him in his room or corner for time out, I did it. If I said he would get a spanking, I did it. So he learned, fast. Sometimes he doesn't do it without a fuss or some resistance, but for the most part he listens. I know he just tests me to see if I'll give in or not follow through, that's what they do.

    Answer by LuvMyBabies912 at 3:37 PM on Feb. 15, 2011

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