Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

6 Bumps

I had a disagreement with a friend a number of years ago. I said I would always choose my child over a man. She said that her SO would be first. How about you?

 
tootoobusy

Asked by tootoobusy at 11:41 AM on Feb. 13, 2011 in Relationships

Level 52 (487,465 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (40)
  • FrincknFrack got it right. I think it's actually best for me and my hubby to put our marriage first. That doesn't mean I make the kids wait for their supper until I take care of all of hubby's needs, it means we value our marriage, each other and showing our kids what a healthy, happy, successful marriage looks like. It means showing our kids that while we are individuals Mom and Dad, we are also a unit MomandDad. We are the foundation of our family and if we are not strong in our relationship, the foundation will crumble and the family will not stand.

    Now if I had to choose to save either my kids or my hubby from a burning building or from drowning - hubby can take care of himself and we'd both be focused on saving the kids.
    canadianmom1974

    Answer by canadianmom1974 at 2:22 PM on Feb. 13, 2011

  • A man is an adult, he can take care of himself. A child, on the other hand, has no one but you. You are responsible for raising that child into a decent human being. You are responsible for his care and protection.
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 11:45 AM on Feb. 13, 2011

  • My husband and I have put our marriage first it is the reason we have our children and once our kids leave home and start their own lives it will be just the two of us. I have seen so many of our friends neglect each other and only care for their kids and when the kids leave home they have nothing together anymore and they divorce.


    My kids benefit from having two parents who are in love and are teaching them how to have healthy relationships.  My kids are well cared for and that we love them very much. We don't neglect our kids we are doing out jobs as parents to make sure they have a healthy and happy home. 

    FricknFrack

    Answer by FricknFrack at 12:02 PM on Feb. 13, 2011

  • ~*Depends*~... if my SO were abusing our kids than I would naturally choose my kid over my child's abuser!

    However, my husband and I are the foundation of this family, WE came before our kids! And when my kids are over 18 and moved out, it is my HUSBAND that I will still be with SO HE COMES FIRST

    I think people fail to understand the actual dynamics of a family, and the purpose of 2 parents, and why so many in this day are broken? We teach our children how to be with their children and I would hate to set my children up for failure or thinking they are the center of the universe instead of just a piece of it.. everyone in life does NOT get a trophy, that is reality
    MommaClark3

    Answer by MommaClark3 at 12:23 PM on Feb. 13, 2011

  • Children first men can take care of themselves. Plus any man that would expect you to pick them over your child is a loser that does not deserve to have you.

    Alanaplus3

    Answer by Alanaplus3 at 11:51 AM on Feb. 13, 2011

  • My child does and always will come first!

    Working with CPS -- I have seen soooooo many instances where the woman chooses the man over her children - In court one day last week -- a judge told a mom that her children could come home IF the man were no longer going to be there -- She chose the man and said goodbye to her children. I wanted to smack her and yell how stupid that decision was! UGH!
    BaileysMom476

    Answer by BaileysMom476 at 11:57 AM on Feb. 13, 2011

  • I believe we have to put our relationship first because it's what holds our family together. Of course, I would never let our children be harmed or neglected but there is no danger of that in our family.
    spamica

    Answer by spamica at 12:04 PM on Feb. 13, 2011

  • My child comes first.
    Simplicity3

    Answer by Simplicity3 at 11:43 AM on Feb. 13, 2011

  • Your chid should always come first before a man.
    gammie

    Answer by gammie at 11:45 AM on Feb. 13, 2011

  • I agree with FricknFrack. If your life is going to be child-centered what will you have after they leave?
    matthewscandi

    Answer by matthewscandi at 12:06 PM on Feb. 13, 2011

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN