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Are we really that damaged?

Why are so many things considered abuse now a days? When I was a kid I got spankings, I had my teeth brushed with soap, And I went to bed hungery if I didn't want what was for dinner. I thnk I had wonderful parents!! They were loving, I always had every thing I needed and most of what I wanted, And they tought me how to be a decent human being. So why is it that if I were a child now I would probably be taken from them and put into foster care because of how they disciplined?? Would that have made me a better person than I am today? I know and believe there are many different kinds of abuse and truely abused kids need to be taken from their parents, but I know many children and adults who are or were "abused" by definition who are and were healthy and happy people. What do you think?


Asked by Anon344 at 11:19 PM on Feb. 14, 2011 in Parenting Debate

Level 16 (2,352 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (36)
  • If the kids today were raised the way we were, there would be less problems in our society. The problems today makes you wonder if they even have morals anymore.

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:16 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

  • No, its that kids today think they should be handed anything and everything. If thery don't get what they want, they use threats by saying they will call CPS. God forbid u say no then the next thing u know CPS will be ar your door investigating abuse allegations, while they really need to be at the house down the street where a child is really being abused. As far as I am concerned, if my child threatens me like that? Then I damn will make the visit from CPS worth their time!!!

    Answer by Michigan-Mom74 at 12:37 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

  • I've got two things: I wasn't spanked and I never had my mouth washed out with soap. I was allowed to not eat if I didn't like what was on the table for dinner, as are my boys. I was also taught how to be a decent human being and I don't see a huge sense of entitlement in my own children. Although I don't see anything on your list that would technically be abuse, I do favor parenting strategies that are not violent because I don't think violence is a way to solve problems.

    Answer by Dr.Donna at 6:31 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

  • We "baby" our kids for way too long.

    Answer by keisha613 at 7:27 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

  • Over the years these tactics you mentioned have been proven by studies to do more harm than good, and it was totally accepted back then, times change and so should we. [older]

    Most of those studeis were done by people who have never had kids and have no clue how to raise them. If those tactics were so bad and the new ones are so good, then why are there far more problems with kids today? 


    Answer by SpiritedWitch at 9:29 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

  • I agree, we coddle them so much, how do we expect them to get along in life? I can tell you, mine are not living off of me forever, that is for darn sure!

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:11 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

  • Sorry I disagree that being punished in that manner made you a better person. Because someone took the time to teach you gave you those standards. You can instill good behavior and morals in a child without spanking. Can you recall how it made you feel at the time? It wasn't a learning experience it may have been eye opening because you were humiliated and shocked. Perhaps it was different for you. Not everyone feels the same is all I am saying. The parents that take time to teach their kids and lead by example this was also done with you so you learned. Many people take the spanking thing way too far, you don't need to hit a child to get your message across in most cases.

    Answer by chgomom at 6:34 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

  • Over the years these tactics you mentioned have been proven by studies to do more harm than good, and it was totally accepted back then, times change and so should we.

    Answer by older at 9:24 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

  • I agree's kinda like the whole PC thing too....I can say for certain, I am electronically challenged!

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 11:21 PM on Feb. 14, 2011

  • Kids today feel that they are entitled to every thing and if they don't get it they act like spoiled brats. I believe that spanking is not abuse, not even close and no it is not humiliating either. I was never spanked in front of any one else, so its not like there was any one laughing or looking while i got a swat on the butt. Now i know what real abuse is, there is big difference between a swat on the butt with the hand that doesn't leave any mark what so ever, to being choked or beaten with a brush or a belt that leaves bruises and welts. My kids have gotten a swat on the butt or a slap on the hand for doing something that is dangerous to them but they have never even cried over it nor have they even been phased by it. But they did stop doing what was dangerous to themselves and find other things to do. IF you don't teach your kids boundaries when they are little when are they going to learn???

    Answer by mrssundin at 8:02 AM on Feb. 15, 2011