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Can I move if the Military is making my husband..

I have joint legal and physical custody with my son and his dad. We have 50/50 custody and he is a police officer. He has our son on his days off of work. Unfortunately, my current husband is in the military and is being stationed in Texas. Currently we live in California. I am pregnant and I don't want to separate another family. Can I move to Texas with my husband and take my son with me? His father is a good dad but can only have him on his days off of work because of his job. I could be a stay at home mom and be able to focus on my son and his schooling. My son is almost 4 years old. I want him to go to a good school system but the schools in california are not the greatest. please help...

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mommybear515

Asked by mommybear515 at 12:21 AM on Feb. 15, 2011 in Relationships

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • What does the boy's father say? What does the court say if it is court ordered?
    It is horrible but I do not think the military cares.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 12:24 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

  • wow, that is really tough. You are love your son and don't want to take him away from his dad , but you totally entitled to continue living your life as well. I would say talk to his father and make some definite plans about travel arrangements and then talk with your son. I think with good communication , even perhaps some live video chatting between him and your son you can do both. Move and keep their relationship just as close as they are now. I used video chatted with my youngest son, and he loved it. He could show his dad his toys and its a lot better than using the phone because he could see his fathers face
    momtoyoung

    Answer by momtoyoung at 12:28 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

  • That's a tough one. I would thinnk they would let you though seeing as how he is with you most of the time and they do tend to side with the mother. If not, I would just stay wherever you are now. I know you will miss dh but if it were me I would want to keep custody of my sona and see him as much as I could.
    SweetLoveofMine

    Answer by SweetLoveofMine at 12:28 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

  • All laws are different in each state. Sometimes they vary even from county to county. When my son divorced his wife, she remarried quickly. Her new Husband was on active duty. He got orders. My son refused to let her move with him. He fought it in court and the court said if she wanted to go with her husband that was fine..but the boy will stay with his Dad. She wound up giving him custody because she then had 2 other kids with the new hubby. The military won't have a say in the matter. The courts will. In many places you have to recieve permission from the courts to take a child out of the state. Good Luck.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 12:31 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

  • The military doesn't get involved in most civil situations, especially pertaining to divorce or child custody. However, as far as taking your son with you this is most likely going to come back to what his bio Dad has to say about it. Of course different areas have their own laws and rules, but I see it generally happening three ways. 1. Bio Dad not allowing the move. 2. Bio Dad allowing the move and you get to go. 3. Taking it to a judge for him to make the final say so. Generally speaking if the bio Dad is active in your sons life, I cannot see the judge allowing the move. But hey, it happens and things vary.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:36 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

  • If I were your ex, I would really fight you on this. You might be allowed to move, but you will have to pay all transportation costs so that your son can have a good relationship with his father. This could become extremely costly. Just because you have remarried, does not mean that your ex should suffer the loss of the good relationship he has now with his child.
    lilangilyn

    Answer by lilangilyn at 7:38 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

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