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3 Bumps

How do you get a 3 year old boy to behave?

we have tried spanking
slapping hand
is there anything else we can try we tell him what he has done wrong when we punish him but he doesnt care what we dsay and he claims that me and his dad r not his parents but that oma and papa r what do i do he tells me im not the boss when i try to tell him to behave papa is the boss he says im losing my patience here and need some advise some good advise


Asked by Anonymous at 12:09 PM on Feb. 17, 2011 in Preschoolers (3-4)

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • His behavior is completely approriate for his age and development. Age three and four are "testing" years, and they will do things like that.
    Keep in mind that you are trying to "shape" his behavior, not punish it. It will not change right away, but you will be able to "shape" him out of this stage by:
    1) Time-outs (three minutes is appropriate)
    2) Taking away toys for a few hours
    3) Using a reward chart for "good behavior". This actually works! Don't get mad and punish . . . he will WANT to be good for his chart

    Try really hard not to yell and not to spank. Those seem to work because you are instilling fear, but they are very bad for healthy development, and teach the kids to yell and hit.

    You will not be able to take the "toddler" out of your toddler, so keep it positive, and ":shape" your child through the toddler stage. By age 5, he will be absolutely delightful.

    Answer by ImaginationMama at 12:32 PM on Feb. 17, 2011

  • I disagree. I think you should punish them. They are old enough to understand NO! and they know they are doing something wrong they are just trying to test us at this point. I think taking away his favorite toy or sitting him in time out works the best. Im having trouble with my little guy too. He back talks and things. Im in the same boat you are. Just stay strong mom. It will all work out.

    Answer by jmgblair10 at 12:21 PM on Feb. 17, 2011

  • its hard but you have to stand your ground, spanking is more of a stress relief for you, grounding he is 3 he dont get that concept, but timeouts are an awesome thing, you start off telling him why your making him sit down sometimes you have to continue to put him back, the rule of thmb for time is a min per year, after time served you tell him that behavior is not acceptable and make him apologize. consistancy is the key Gl

    Answer by wyattgrace at 12:29 PM on Feb. 17, 2011

  • And, hugs . . . . we all have been there . . . . I like to say that the "terrible twos" are REALLY the "terrible two, threes, and fours". Big breath. It is hard work being a mommy and you deserve a pat on the back for every minute of time and love you have given your kids.

    Answer by ImaginationMama at 12:36 PM on Feb. 17, 2011

  • spanking DOES NOT WORK. You don't GET him to behave. You teach him HOW to behave. Grounding him confuses him and has no idea what you are wanting him to think about while in time out. If you don't teach him first then you can't expect him to do it right. This is the teaching age not the punishing age.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:10 PM on Feb. 17, 2011

  • Keep on with what you are doing. Be consistent. Time out, etc. It's hard work, but be patient, if you can. It will eventually work.

    Answer by SweetLuci at 12:56 PM on Feb. 18, 2011

  • Nothing wrong with spanking. If your spanking him and its not working your not doing it correctly. Try baring his bottom and giving him 3 or 4 pops on the bottom. And the others are right that you need to stand your ground.

    Answer by Iamasinglemom99 at 12:17 AM on Feb. 22, 2011