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2 Bumps

Serious biomom issues

my dh and i recently gained custody of his 4 kids because the biomom was allowing her 5 yr old daughter to be sexually molested by her half brother. the mom didnt get prosecuted, and we r court orderedto le her c the children. she now wants tokeep them all weekend instead of the usual short visits on weekends. i do not trust her judgement and worry about the kids safey but the miss bioom and want to stay... it just seems to soon, they r ages 5, 6, 8, and 12.... so vulnerable!! my dh doesnt c a problem buti wont sleep a wink all weekend if they g with her!

Answer Question
 
ash.k.ray

Asked by ash.k.ray at 9:08 AM on Feb. 18, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 4 (56 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • What does the court order say? What are her visitation rights? And how long has this arrangement been going on?

    MrsDAP

    Answer by MrsDAP at 9:11 AM on Feb. 18, 2011

  • wow i am suprised that she is alwayed to see them unsuprvised........i feel sorry for the kids and understand they miss thier mom but in the long run i think it would be in thier best interst to only have daytime visits with her.....hope you can talk to your dh about keeping them safe
    cara124

    Answer by cara124 at 9:11 AM on Feb. 18, 2011

  • I would go with the short visits. You want to be very cautious.
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 9:13 AM on Feb. 18, 2011

  • What is in the custody agreement? Is there any word about her seeing the kids or can she take them out? I would go to the court and ask them for a full custody with no overnight visitation from the biomum part... It is sooooo dangerous. If she let his half-brother hurt her child(ren) than she would do that again. That woman has something wrong with her head. OMG!!!
    adriennfaklya

    Answer by adriennfaklya at 9:16 AM on Feb. 18, 2011

  • the court order says she is to go to counseling with them and is allowwed at my dh discretion to have them overnight. he is totally babyfooting around her and we argue about it constantly. she is a hzard to the children and he thinks i just dont like her...but how can u stand anyone who woujld do what she did? the court didnt press charges on her cause thy said it would putth kids undermore sress. the guilty 15yr old who colmmited the abuse is alredy back rding the schoolbus with small children, he got one yr house arrest. our justice system is sickening.
    ash.k.ray

    Comment by ash.k.ray (original poster) at 9:21 AM on Feb. 18, 2011

  • How long has this arrangement been going on? Have you had any issues/problems with her seeing them during her day visits?
    Sad to say, but this is more of his and her decision. Try baby steps first. IF you were to agree on an overnight stay. Drop kids off later in evening and pick them up first thing in morning. See how that goes.... but would not make it an every weekend thing.

    I am in NO WAY taking bio Moms side. Just trying to give benefit of doubt.
    You have to go with gut instinct and protect the kids.
    MrsDAP

    Answer by MrsDAP at 9:37 AM on Feb. 18, 2011

  • i agree, it isnt my decision as much... but when i do more for the kids than biomom ever thought of and they come to me not their dad when they need things. its hard to be put in the middle of every other aspect but butted out of this one... especially when its completely about the chbildrens safety. i will try to talk to him about just tryhing over night at first...
    ash.k.ray

    Comment by ash.k.ray (original poster) at 10:53 AM on Feb. 18, 2011

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