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Rude Future FIL-VENT.

My fiance and I have a baby together. Our baby is 6 1/2 months old and we just got engaged on V-Day. My fiance's family is really religious and conservative. We only see them on holidays and birthdays for the most part. My FH occasionally works for his godfather, but that's about it. Anyways...they always try to push their beliefs on EJ and it drives him crazy. He knew that they'd be all over him when they found out I was pregnant so we waited until I was about 4 or 5 months along. His godfather was so polite and nice on the phone about it(I suspect because he didn't know if I was listening. They never talk about the situation with me) and then a few days later when EJ was working for him he told EJ how he really felt...either get married or put the baby up for adoption. So obviously that made both of us mad 1. because it's our life. 2.marriage has always been in the plan. Then they told us we couldn't come to family stuff until we were married so the younger kids could be "protected". Once we had our son they SLOWLY warmed up. We were "allowed" to come to family stuff and all that. They got us all xmas gifts and us them. Though I found out later godfather asked EJ to tell me if I needed to nurse I needed to go to another room. 1. I'm doing what's best for my baby 2. I always use a cover and 3. I wouldn't want to nurse in front of them anyways! OK, now fast forward to the present...EJ posted on his FB that he proposed and I said yes. Of course everyone was congratulating us and all that. WELL EJ's godfather posted this: "Congratulations. Collin deserves it for sure." WTH. Why can't you just say congrats??? Not only was that rude, but our other friends and family saw that. And you've made it perfectly clear how you feel about our situation. Was that really necessary??? What happened to if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all?!

Am I overreacting or would you be mad too? I'm not going to say anything. I never do, It's not worth it. But geeeez!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 
CollinsMommy729

Asked by CollinsMommy729 at 4:32 PM on Feb. 18, 2011 in Relationships

Level 19 (7,802 Credits)
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Answers (7)
  • I'm not even in your shoes and his comments make me angry. I think trying to ignore his rudeness would be best, but I really can't believe how rude some people are!
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 12:58 AM on Feb. 19, 2011

  • it's best that you don't say anything, hopefully you will get the respect you deserve after you are married. it's sad that he would say that but i guess he really feels that way. sorry.
    angevil53

    Answer by angevil53 at 4:36 PM on Feb. 18, 2011

  • I'm sorry! xoxoxo
    CABlonde

    Answer by CABlonde at 4:38 PM on Feb. 18, 2011

  • Why let this guy get to you? If you are happy and comfortable with your decisions then ignore him. Letting him bother you like this is giving him power over you. On a side note, I don't see how his FB comment was rude, personally
    KWnavywife

    Answer by KWnavywife at 4:45 PM on Feb. 18, 2011

  • If it were someone else saying that it'd be different... I know how he's been through this whole thing...he says it like Collin has been mistreated because we aren't married. Collin is our first priority! EJ and I are very happy and I'm prefectly fine with just now being engaged. He just seems to need to make his beliefs clear over and over. My family also wished we had been married first. They said their bit and left it at that. They have been there the whole time supporting and loving us.
    CollinsMommy729

    Comment by CollinsMommy729 (original poster) at 4:51 PM on Feb. 18, 2011

  • I'll be honest. You cannot expect everyone to be on board with having a baby out of wedlock. Some people like myself, believe morally that it is very wrong. For those of us who feel this way, it is a very hard thing to get past. I think they will get past it, but you need to give them time and space.
    lilangilyn

    Answer by lilangilyn at 8:36 PM on Feb. 18, 2011

  • lilangilyn----I understand that people feel that way....its the fact that he keeps bringing it up over and over and over. Its like we get it ok!! At this point, either be in our lives and respect our beliefs, or don't be in our lives. We don't bash them for what they believe. We KNOW we should have been married first, but I don't regret how it happened one bit. We have a happy lil family and that's all that matters! And thank you Austinsmom35---I appreciate the support!
    CollinsMommy729

    Comment by CollinsMommy729 (original poster) at 11:23 AM on Feb. 22, 2011

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