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Should I get back with him after a custody battle?

A quick recap... My ex and I dated for 3yrs we have a beautiful one year old and everything in our relationship was pretty good ( it wasnt perfect we did have our moments) but for the most of it it was good. We only had problems when it came to his mother always demanding our son, so thats when he ran off with my son for 8 days and I had to file for custody. right now we are barely on speaking terms but we are starting again. To be honest I still love him and the only reason I try to stay away from him is because I know that I still ( through all of this that he has put me through) love him. I just need advice as to what I should do? I know that im the only one that can make the final decission but i would love to hear from other moms that have been where im at now. ** also my sons 1st birthday party is coming up and he wants to come what should i do ? but i would love for him to be there

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TristensMommy1

Asked by TristensMommy1 at 6:58 PM on Nov. 18, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (6)
  • I'd never, ever trust anyone who harmed my child or tried to take my child from me, ever. I'd also never be with anyone who's mother would try to take my child. IMO, if someone would do this to you once, they'd do it again. I also would question their motives for wanting to be with me.

    I'd do all I could to wrap up the custody issues and move on with my life.
    pugpin

    Answer by pugpin at 7:02 PM on Nov. 18, 2008

  • How can you trust him? If he ran off once, he might just do it again.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 7:25 PM on Nov. 18, 2008

  • wait a minute. he took you son for eight days without your permission? Hell no, I would never EVER get back with him. I'm married and my husband and I both ask and consult each other with every parental decision that needs to be made. He has no respect for you as his child's mother. And he sounds like a momma's boy. I would strongly advice you not to get back with him. But I think your gut is telling you that anyway. Follow your mommy gut and don't get hung up on your feelings. As far the the birthday party, let him come. But watch him! I mean how do you build back trust again after ran off with your son? I'd never trust him. One thing I don't play with, is when it comes to my children.
    momof2boys423

    Answer by momof2boys423 at 7:26 PM on Nov. 18, 2008

  • Let him attend the birthday party, but make sure there are several people you trust aware of what he did and that he is not to be alone with your son. Don't get back with him....anyone who would take your child like that, and leave you to wonder and worry does not really care about you, or the child. Love takes time to get over, give yourself time to heal, but do not get back with him. That would be a mistake, you'd be leaving yourself open to allow him to do this again.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 7:30 PM on Nov. 18, 2008

  • I married my second husband twice. It didn't work then either. But seriously he took your less than year old child from you w/o mutual concent for 8 days and you had to file coustody for return??? He didn't file as well??? ... it's probable his moma is gonna want to be at the party too. I'd let them both come & show them how mature you are & then let them both know in no uncertain terms that it is so not cool to kidnap your own child! Keep him your ex. Sounds like he can't be trusted! IMHO
    aajsluckymommy

    Answer by aajsluckymommy at 7:53 PM on Nov. 18, 2008

  • Heck noooo i wouldnt let him attend, love him and call it at that...he stole your baby!!!!!! he could do it agian and you might never find them,!!!
    LexsiesMommy

    Answer by LexsiesMommy at 7:55 PM on Nov. 18, 2008

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