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Kids fighting

My odd is 7 and my middle dd is 3. I have a newborn as well. The older seem to be fighting constantly recently. Plus, they're always at the worst when the baby needs me so I can't handle them. Just wondering on idead to decrease the fighting. I can't stand hearing them screaming at each other and especially if one hits the other. I've tried many ways to get them stop and nothing seems to work. I'll take any advice at this point.

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katcb1019

Asked by katcb1019 at 6:30 PM on Feb. 20, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 15 (2,035 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • Exaggerate your disappointment. "OH NO! Mom is SOOOO SAD!!!" Then state why. Then you let the punishment do the teaching. Like making them clean their room or something that you and your SO deem appropriate.
    2murphyboys

    Answer by 2murphyboys at 6:33 PM on Feb. 20, 2011

  • Sit them on the couch, make them be quiet and hold hands. You can hold the baby, while you are sitting on the couch beside them...reminding them this is their quiet time because they were fighting. I would also recommend taking away whatever it was they were fighting about, if it comes down to taking all the toys away from them for a day or so then do so. My 12 year old still fights with my 5 and 6 year old.... it's rough. Good Luck hun.
    kitchenwitch78

    Answer by kitchenwitch78 at 6:39 PM on Feb. 20, 2011

  • I wish I knew the answer. Usually I find myself ignoring my kids when they're fighting. My son is 7 and goes to school all day, and my daughter is almost 4 and worships the ground her brother walks on. My son would very much rather sit on his duff and read books all day, while my daughter gets into everything and wants to play all day. So I hear a lot of: Bo, come play with me!!! No, I don't want to. THEN the tantrum from one or both ensues, to be followed by "Mom do I/does Bo have to play with her/me?" Tiredly I tell them several times a day that THEY have to work it out between them, that I'm tired of being in the middle.
    Rosehawk

    Answer by Rosehawk at 6:46 PM on Feb. 20, 2011

  • One idea.......my niece has a kindness chart in her home. The kids have to do the things on the chart and they get points or stickers for doing them. After a week or so they get a day out to the park, go out for ice cream, have a special meal, go to a museum, etc. It has worked wonders for them.

    Also, make sure the older two are getting one on one time with you and your SO. Plus praise when they do something right. It is a difficult time for them when a new baby comes into the family. Some of the best advice I ever got was to make it about the older children when the baby first comes home so they do not feel replaced. Best wishes!!
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 8:44 PM on Feb. 20, 2011

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