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Is there a way to tell if a man is gay (one who claims to be straight and is dating a woman)?

What I mean is...a man that says he straight...but you think he just might not be.

My friend is dating this guy and she thinks he might be gay, but she doesn't know why she thinks that (she's not "been with him" in *that way* yet either). Are there ways to tell if a man is gay if he's doing a good job of hiding it? What can I tell her to look for?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:22 AM on Feb. 21, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • I think that is something she will have to stick around and see or go with her gut and tell him she only wants to be friends. There is no way to know until he comes out to her. All in all what does it really matter if they are happy? Any relationship can end suddenly and for a variety of reasons. Coming out is a really personal and private thing. Depending how close they are emotionally she could talk to him about this.
    jamesonjustines

    Answer by jamesonjustines at 9:29 AM on Feb. 21, 2011

  • Yes, there is. You say, "Are you gay?" That's the only way to know for sure...if he tells you.
    misses_nick

    Answer by misses_nick at 9:33 AM on Feb. 21, 2011

  • i knew a friend of mine was gay but i never brought it up even if he was dating a girl. i knew bc he was very (like overly) picky about girls. i suggest to her to just ask him and trust him either way. maybe he's just not ready to come clean to himself yet. i know a guy that moved in with his hs sweetheart for two years and got married before he was ready to come out. they are still good friends now. they did have sex but she said she still knew the whole time but was hoping she saw something that wasn't there.
    angevil53

    Answer by angevil53 at 10:10 AM on Feb. 21, 2011

  • He could be in denial. I know several guys in the military that I think are gay but they can't admit it so they train themselves to convince others they are straight. Keep in mind that there are many men who are delicate looking and seem gay but are not. If this is a serious relationship she needs to just get up the nerve to ask.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:59 AM on Feb. 21, 2011

  • I am only attracted to "manly" men. If a guy seems the least bit feminine I would be in the other direction quick. That being said, SHAME on any many who acts manly and tries to be with women when he's gay. Ladies don't want to be a cover-up!
    HKing01

    Answer by HKing01 at 11:01 AM on Feb. 21, 2011

  • If he kisses you in a "too sweet" way, if his lips act strange, i.e. hm, are too familiar with banana kissing @ !!!
    Sorry, this sounds funny but it's personal experience !!
    Listen to YOUR HORMONES! The most important thing is, try to establish a deep friendship, understanding of
    his character, cause then, if you know how he thinks and what he wants in life, you may understand everything.

    SOME TIMESBEING DECEIVED IN LOVE CAN BE A TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCE. DON'T LET THIS WORRY YOU,
    THINK POSITIVE. THERE ARE FAR TOO MANY STRAIGHT MEN OUT THERE !!!!!!!
    lillyblue111

    Answer by lillyblue111 at 12:17 PM on Feb. 21, 2011

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