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2 Bumps

4th baby shower in 4 years !!!

My cousin is pregnant with #4 ... and it has only been a little over 4 years since she had her first ( first baby and first baby shower) ......

In our family we only have a shower for the 1st baby ( like me and my other cousins and aunts) - except there was one time when my aunt had a second shower when she had her 3rd child -- but it was a surprise baby and was 14 years younger than her last baby lol...and now her.

So not only do I think its rude to have a 4th babyshower in less than 5 years ...but she also expects us to only buy the things she has already picked out ( she has tried this with all the others) .... we all told her after the last one there would be no more baby showers but of course we got the invite today ( yes she is throwing it herself just like #2 and #3) ... she also included what we should bring to the party ( i got veggie tray + a gift that she has already pre-selected) ....I am seriously thinking of boycotting it. what would you do ?


Asked by Anonymous at 1:36 PM on Feb. 21, 2011 in Parenting Debate

This question is closed.
Answers (31)
  • Nothing wrong with a 4th shower- LOTS wrong with THIS 4th shower!

    Answer by soyousay at 6:39 PM on Feb. 21, 2011

  • I think having a baby shower for each baby is a great idea but the way that you state, this is more about her than the baby.

    Baby showers are for babies. this is a party for her. I would decline to go.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 1:39 PM on Feb. 21, 2011

  • You only have one baby shower. Yes it is rude, I agree.

    Answer by sta517 at 1:40 PM on Feb. 21, 2011

  • I have never ever heard of telling someone what gift to buy. That is incredibly rude and tacky.

    Answer by jamesonjustines at 2:02 PM on Feb. 21, 2011

  • I personally wouldn't go.
    Of course I would buy the baby a gift and I would give it whenever I felt like it. I wouldn't let anyone, even a family member decide what gift I was buying for them. I understand not wanting duplicates and such, that's why you do a registry and everyone can buy off of that. That way everyone can buy what they can afford.
    What she did with the food was wrong too! I would never do something like. Of course I always offer to bring something but that's completely different. To demand people bring things and be so picky is just wrong. Usually in my family if someone OFFERS to bring something then we'll ask them to bring a dessert or appetizer or whatever....but never give specifics and say you HAVE TO MAKE THIS.
    Seriously, I'd pretend I didn't get that invite.

    Answer by Jessica45 at 2:42 PM on Feb. 21, 2011

  • Every child deserves the same attention and recognition as the 1st child. As well as deserving their own new things. All my life, everyone who had multiple babies had multiple showers. Only in the past few years have I started hearing rants about more than one shower beyond the 1st child. I guess the "In" thing now is the 1st child gets all the glory & the following children just get the hand-me-downs from day 1.  Nothing wrong with hand-me-downs. Don't get me wrong. But, doesn't every baby deserve the same attention & new beginning?


    Answer by specialwingz at 1:42 PM on Feb. 21, 2011

  • Inappropriate and entitled, both giving her own shower and multiple showers for subsequent pregnancies. I would make sure I had plans that day and send a card and thats it.

    Answer by jamesonjustines at 1:43 PM on Feb. 21, 2011

  • I would send the baby a gift, whatever you want, because it's the thought that counts. And decline the invite.

    Answer by amybaby_19 at 1:50 PM on Feb. 21, 2011

  • I don't think the shower itself is wrong. But, with more description, the way she is doing it is definitely tacky. She could have done a registry, gotten with a friend to hostess and offered a choice list of potluck dishes to bring. And, a SHOWER OUTFIT?!? Now THAT'S a bit over the top! LOL.

    Answer by specialwingz at 1:58 PM on Feb. 21, 2011

  • Your whole family needs to get together boycot the one she is throwing and maybe throw her one that is on your terms. Have it at 3pm so you can get away with a fruit and veggie tray and a cake and than people can get what they want to not what they where told to.

    Answer by Alanaplus3 at 2:14 PM on Feb. 21, 2011