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What do you think?

My MIL is taking my husband and I to court for visitation of our daughter. We've never told her she couldn't see her, but we just don't want her to take her for a day. She's married, but lives with her BF who is abusive-we can't trust her to take care of the well being of our daughter if she can't take care of her own well being. I don't want my daughter forced to be with her. She doesnt know her and she would be scared to leave with her. Her fault, not ours. She's never been around. In the last year alone, shes only come to visit three maybe four times and hasn't come since she said she was taking us to court. Should I be worried or should I not worry at all?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:07 AM on Nov. 19, 2008 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • She got mad when my husband said she couldn't take our daughter for the day and said that she would see us in court. I don't know where she got the idea that could do this and win.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:14 AM on Nov. 19, 2008

  • So I was looking online and deleted my previous comment because I found this topic on findlaw.com http://public.findlaw.com/abaflg/flg-3-4k-1.html

    Although all states had statutes allowing grandparents to seek visitation with their grandchildren, the U.S. Supreme Court issued a ruling in 2000 that will make it more difficult for grandparents to obtain court-ordered visits with their grandchildren. In the case of Troxel v. Granville, the Court found that fit parents should be given more deference on decisions regarding with whom the child will associate than was provided by the Washington State law. (cont below)
    bubblycute

    Answer by bubblycute at 1:16 AM on Nov. 19, 2008

  • ...cont....The Court left open the possibility that some grandparents could obtain court-ordered visitation if, for example, the grandparents can show that they had a particularly strong relationship with their grandchildren, it would harm the child not to continue the relationship, and it is in the child's best interest to continue. The burden of proof is on the grandparents.
    bubblycute

    Answer by bubblycute at 1:16 AM on Nov. 19, 2008

  • Your MIL needs to realize that it's not fair to you or her son to force you to go through this with your child. It's your right as a parent to chose who you have in or not in your childs life. If she loved her son so much she wouldn't be doing this. It's a giant waste of time on her part because I can't see any courts granting this when there is no reason.
    bubblycute

    Answer by bubblycute at 1:17 AM on Nov. 19, 2008

  • Some states don't even recognize grandparents rights. If you live in in one that does, though, you'll have all the things you just listed in your favor. Like you said, you never said she couldn't see her, so make sure you tell them that (it makes you look good!). Request that all visits be at your house or at a neutral territory with you or yor husband there. Good luck!
    mamapotter

    Answer by mamapotter at 1:18 AM on Nov. 19, 2008

  • I would say when you go to court explain how you feel about the boyfriend and that she doesnt even really know the baby....it's your baby so if your not safe with letting her take the baby she shouldnt be allowed....
    JuLiAnSmOmMy317

    Answer by JuLiAnSmOmMy317 at 2:14 AM on Nov. 19, 2008

  • I wouldn't worry about it, if she actually does take you to court let the judge know why you won't let her take your child and I don't see any judge taking her side.
    sammiesmom2000

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 8:51 AM on Nov. 19, 2008

  • She won't win, sleep easy sister!
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 3:22 PM on Nov. 19, 2008

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