Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

DONT KNOW WHAT IS RIGHT adult content

so i been with my babys father for almost 3 years. we broke up in july for 6 months. in dec we had got an apartment to gether because we were going to work out relationship out. well things have been on the rough. he really isnt here, he wont have sex with me, but we can sleep in the same bed. he drives my car. one issue i have is that he says he cant trust me and i know that a reletionship is nothing with out trust. the baby doesnt seem him much, its like he dont have a connection with her. he has another daughter that he talks to all the time, carries pictures of but my daughter is like in the shit hole. is it possible that he is having sex with someone else? (we have only had sex 3 times since dec) IS IT STILL FIXABLE.. if need more info let me know

Answer Question
 
bb2luv

Asked by bb2luv at 8:53 AM on Feb. 22, 2011 in Relationships

Level 2 (7 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • No one can pic for you, but if he treated my kid like a second class citzen he would be out the door. The other problems are pretty dang bad too.
    Alanaplus3

    Answer by Alanaplus3 at 8:55 AM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • pick sorry k must have stuck
    Alanaplus3

    Answer by Alanaplus3 at 8:56 AM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • Can you go to couples counseling? That may be the answer to help get you back on track. I would want to address the trust issue, the intimacy issue w/ you & w/ your dau. Why hasnt he bonded w/ her yet? It seems there is alot of work to be done here, so if you are both willing to put in the time & effort, anything is possible. GL
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 8:57 AM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • during them 6 months we ended up going to court for custody, and he only had seen her 2 times during them months but i did have a stay away on him. in nov is when he contacted me on myspace asking how she was doing and ect. after that we talked on the phone and he seen her 3 times a week but not alone for 20 mins each. k think that us moving together that fast was a big change to him. but he needs to get that connection with her!
    bb2luv

    Comment by bb2luv (original poster) at 9:01 AM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • It seems he does what works in his favor. If he's not having sex with you he's having it with someone else I am betting. Three times isn't exceptable unless hes old, depressed or diabled. You posted this thread so you know you and your daughter deserve WAY more than what you're getting. I'm sorry but I am sure you already have the answer since you reached out and posted this thread. Don't let him use your car or you if he won't go to counseling and make that commitment you need to move on. I know it's tough however, you can't let him use you and treat you like a doormat. Please if not for you do it for your beautiful daughter you both deserve the best.
    chgomom

    Answer by chgomom at 9:37 AM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • If he treated my child like that, he'd be finding a new apartment, I think. Also, the way he treats you is horrible- he does for you when it's convenient for him. Not a good relationship, IMO. Sorry, Mama.
    lovingmy4babies

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 10:01 AM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • I would be honest with him about how you feel. If he isn't willing to make things better I would go make my life better without him.
    HKing01

    Answer by HKing01 at 11:39 AM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • You are talking about two separate issues- his relationship with your/his daughter and then his relationship w/ you. You can't fix it all at once- and sorry to say but moving in together is not a way to fix things. He should have shown a strong effort and desire to fix these relationships. It sounds like you guys aren't his priority, and you need to decide if you guys deserve that. Good luck, if I was you I would leave or do couples counseling.
    lexi8622

    Answer by lexi8622 at 2:45 PM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • ok hun i would leave him he sounds shady and ovesley he really dont care for u or the child u have together .if he cared he would be around alot more but as far as i can tell he is useing u for every thing u have .
    Sara_Carter

    Answer by Sara_Carter at 4:45 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN