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How can I get my 2 yr. old son to go to sleep on his own and sleep in his own bed ?

I have to hold him in my lap untill he falls asleep . Then I put him in his bed and then about 3-4 hours later he comes to me and my husbands bed . When he's in our bed he sleeps all night.

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nikki533

Asked by nikki533 at 10:11 PM on Feb. 22, 2011 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 4 (45 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • I think number one he needs to learn to fall asleep in his bed... rather than you lap, I think he'll likely stop waking at night if he learns to do that. At first you might just sit in his room with him until he falls asleep... but with time stay shorter amounts of time...
    With my son, who is also 2, we do 2 books and a song, then kisses and hugs and lights out and we leave. Start a new routine with your son so he knows what's coming... a book or a special song, kisses and hugs... eventually just leaving.
    We also keep a child knob on my son's door, mostly for his protection so he doens't wander the house at night... but it also knows he can't come and join us in the middle of the night... if he NEEDS us he can call out to us and we'll come.
    AmiJanell

    Answer by AmiJanell at 10:15 PM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • You simply have to draw the line. When you let him come to your bed or hold him until he falls asleep, you're giving him the impression that there is something to be scared about or the impression that you don't think he is capable of doing it himself. Have a chat with him about how he is a big boy and big boys go to sleep on their own and that there are only people in the house who love him and there is nothing to be afraid of. Put him to bed and walk away (with confidence). When he gets out of bed, calmly put him back. Eventually he'll fall asleep (if you're consistent, my guess is he'll have it down in 3 nights...exhausting nights). If your comfortable with it, put a baby gate at his door so he can't leave his room. (I assume the room is well baby proofed...My daughter has been known to get bored and empty bottles of lotion all over her room or pull out every wipe in the package if she has access). Good Luck
    ANGIE409

    Answer by ANGIE409 at 10:19 PM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • Super Nanny has an awesome method that actually works!  I'd watch a few of her shows!

    MrsHouston47302

    Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 10:19 PM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • I put his favorite character sheets on his bed and read hims a story and tell him he needs to go to sleep so he can see the sun "wake" up. :-) Usually works.
    AequitasVeritas

    Answer by AequitasVeritas at 10:22 PM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • Sometimes little ones need you. He may just be going through a developmental growth spurt, and needs some support. They're little, and learning so much. Sometimes they need something to feel secure, and that's you. I wouldn't worry about it. Let him sleep in your room. If you don't want him in your bed, put a twin mattress nest to your bed or something. It won't last forever. Think about how scared you would be if you were scared and alone, and were locked in your room. That idea breaks my heart.
    bamsmom2001

    Answer by bamsmom2001 at 10:23 PM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • let him sleep withy you come on he feels so secured and loved there. what is the worst thing it can happen?
    if you want intimacy with husband go somewherelse :)

    Kids grow up so fast that you should allow him to be with you one day he will turn in to a teenager and he is not going to want nothing to do with you let him love you now!
    amparoortega

    Answer by amparoortega at 10:24 PM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • My daughter is 2 1/2 and sleeps with us, so when you find the solution let me know :) I actually don't mind it though :)
    calliesmommie

    Answer by calliesmommie at 10:33 PM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • we use a bit of tough love when it comes to that issue. put a babygate in front of his door, leave it open with the hall light on, and make sure he's got everything he needs, clean diaper or went potty, and teeth brushed. tuck him in bed and read a story or something, then leave. if he gets up then he'll probably play with toys or something after a huge fit. it will take time but in few weeks he wont want to sleep in your bed and he'll be fine with his.
    dreamangel06

    Answer by dreamangel06 at 11:07 PM on Feb. 22, 2011

  • I agree with bamsmom2001, as well as some others on here that advocate doing this slowly and lovingly... She has a lot of wisdom in what she says...Sometimes kids need to feel that extra protection, as well as parents needing to give that part of themselves to help encourage a balanced, loving relationship with their child...It is up to the parents when to draw the line, of course, but why push the issue? Enjoy the closeness while you can...Little by little the children can be can be weaned...I feel that parents in this situation have to be in tune with what is best for their child, and not following society's or a medical book's ideas on this particular matter...I am positive it will pay off later in your relationship with your child...
    Veronica-Attachment Parenting mom of a Down Syndrome child.....
    VeronicaTex

    Answer by VeronicaTex at 11:26 AM on Feb. 23, 2011

  • I think baby's, toddlers, CHILDREN NEED to be with their parents. It is only a small portion of your life that children will be in your arms, and small enough to even hold on your lap.

    Change your mindset, it isn't a bad thing, it is a good thing.

    CHERISH this time with your little one. Memorizing every inch of their face, the way they breathe, and how their little fingers curl to their palms when they fall asleep.

    ENJOY your child being a child, while they are little. Believe me....this kid isn't going to want to fall asleep in your lap forever, or for long for that matter. Don't force them to grow up, and detach, they need that love and security they get. Just enjoy it, love it, breathe it in deep and realize holding your child till they fall asleep is GOOD and OK.
    BeanIrene1

    Answer by BeanIrene1 at 11:29 AM on Feb. 23, 2011

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