Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

Is it really wrong to just let babies be babies ...

I have a cousin who has a son who is only a couple months older than my son.

Both of our sons are under 2 1/2 years old , but this goes back to when they were babies.

Both boys are very smart, I guess you would say her son is more advanced but I think that is because they have tried to make him grow up so fast and then make me feel bad that I actaully let my son act like a baby / toddler .

My son can talk, walk, run, play, he does everything a 2 year old can do. He has a fun personality and is adventurist (sp) .... but he also likes to be held, sleeps with a stuffed animal and wasnt potty trained until a couple months ago ( right after his 2nd birthday) , he doesnt like to be without me yet ( my daughter was the same way at his age) ... I think this is how a kid his age is suppose to be like.....

BUT if you were to ask my cousin she would make it seem like my son has something wrong with him to be "so far behind" and has even said that he will grow up to be a loser because I hold him.

My daughter was raised and acted the same way - she is now 5 and she is independent and very social... I have no doubt that both of my children will grow up right .... but it just makes me sooo mad that she acts like this.

Her son is barely 24 months she refused to put a diaper or pull up on him after he turned 18 months and even though he still peed and pooped everywhere she insisted he would be potty trained ( I babysay him for awhile and he was NOT potty trained - he didnt even actaully go to the potty until he was 21 months) , she refuses to hold him ( or her 14 months old son) because it will make them "soft" , they cant have stuffed animals or kid toys - only trucks and building blocks, they will willingly go with anyone, and most of all - they have their own 4 wheelers...... at 2 and 1 years old they do not need a 4 wheeler.... and I am not talking about a toy one I am talking about a REAL one - even though it is "kid size" doesnt mean it is for a 1 and 2 year old .... The youngest one cant ride it by himself yet and that actually makes her mad.... the oldest one they let ride by HIMSELF ... yes it took months of "teaching him" but he is a 2 year old operating a motor vehicle , he doesnt even use a helmet ( you know because that will make him "soft") ...

so really who is in the wrong here?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:37 PM on Feb. 23, 2011 in Parenting Debate

Answers (26)
  • Whoa whoa whoa! A loser because you hold him? What kind of thing is that to say? That is the kind of nonsense that screws kids up! I think she is purley jealous of you and your son. She has her opinions (though very insane in my opinion) but she needs to keep them to herself...and I wouldnt leave your son alone with her. She is crazy...

    Answer by ABusyBee at 10:42 PM on Feb. 23, 2011

  • omg definately her. sign up for a parenting class toghether, maybe she'll get the reality check she needs

    Answer by ilovemymonsterr at 10:45 PM on Feb. 23, 2011

  • my son has never been left with her and never will be lol

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:45 PM on Feb. 23, 2011

  • definitely she,she is just not letting her kid grow naturally & is repressing his natural desires & cravings.I don't think they will grow into a responsible adults

    Answer by A11 at 10:48 PM on Feb. 23, 2011

  • SHE is in the wrong, in my opinion. I definitely agree more with you than her!

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 10:48 PM on Feb. 23, 2011

  • she sounds to extreme. My son uis almost 2 and I hold him all the time and give him hugs and kisses! He is my baby and I would NEVER put him on a real 4-wheeler. He has a powerwheels one but that is in no way the same. She is just asking for her children to get hurt... I feel so bad for those kids!

    Answer by June_Mama09 at 10:49 PM on Feb. 23, 2011

  • This cousin needs some parenting classes before one of her kids gets seriously hurt or dies. SHE is the one who is doing harm to her children, not you. YOU are doing the RIGHT thing letting your kids be kids. I did the same thing as you. I can tell you that my 14 yr old is not "soft". He is independent, respectful, intelligent. He does sleep with a blanket he had as a baby and a stuffed wolf. I will NOT stop him. I know kids that went to college with their blankie tucked in their pillowcase. Keep doing what you are and your kids will be just fine. I would NEVER leave your kids with your cousin. I wouldn't even go to that cousins house, ever.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:13 PM on Feb. 23, 2011

  • surprise miniA four wheeler at 2??!!??! Please tell me you're joking!!!? THAT alone, in my opinion, is some kind of dangerous negligence. I'd call the cops or CPS or some kind of anonymous call to SOMEone for the safety of those little boys.

    My kids are 4 and 7 and we cuddle and watch Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy! every night. It's the last bit we do in their bed time routine. ANY time my 4 year old wants some love or cuddles or hugs she gets it. It makes for a more secure, confident, self-assured child.

    Keep doing what you're doing Momma! Your kids will be wonderful people when they're grown.

    giving mom gift


    Answer by Rosehawk at 11:17 PM on Feb. 23, 2011

  • Rosehawk -- she actually use to be a cop - for about 3 years she was an officer, but then she quit to help her mom run a restraunt..... her dad is the new police cheif !!! .... He is one of the people who was clapping and laughing when they first bought the 4 wheelers.....


    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:21 PM on Feb. 23, 2011

  • I think what you are doing is perfectly fine and your kids seem to be doing very well. Kids need love, you're doing that. What your cousin does, on the other hand, IMO is child abuse. The 4-wheelers for babies sounds like something that should be reported to Family Services. I shudder to think what her kids will turn out to be.

    Answer by mikesmom65270 at 11:38 PM on Feb. 23, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.