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from loving to hating me....

i ve been married since 1year,my problem is that my husband has a 10 years old daughter,it wasnt a problem until i got pregnant,she used to love me to play with,tell me her secrets...but now that im pregnant i feel like she hates me ,she is a very spoiled girl,she always gets whatever she wants she sleeps with us in the same room,in the same bed as me and my husband on the floor,and we just moved so she has a room with the futur baby,but she thinks thats its not fair,so at night she ll just wake up and tell us that she has a bad headach to come sleep with us,and the last time she was sleeping with her aunt in the living room so in the morning she just got up and came knocked on the door and opened while i was having sex with my hubby!also even thought she knows that we dont have money (we dont even have furniture)she wants the wii,the uggs,the new ipod,with 150songs,a computer,a desk,and some other stuff

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:22 PM on Nov. 19, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • my sister in law who does not like me tells my hubby that he has to buy her all these things or she is going to feel like he does not love her like he used to,so she spoiles her and always repeat to my hubby that this is how his daughter likes it and which color she wants,she even went and asked my hubby to put a matteress this way and do this...in my own house,
    what should i do i do not want to be the bad stepmom i just want to have my word to say and be respected
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:26 PM on Nov. 19, 2008

  • Well thats part of being a parent. It sounds like shes going through what any normal girl who has a new sibling coming. Shes trying to find her place in the family and see where she stands. My advice of course is not to have sex while shes visiting since shes going to walk in. If she lives with you sit and talk to her about knocking first. Try having a family meeting where you can discuss the baby coming, and any concerns and fears she has. Most of all reassure her that she is still loved and will still be his baby just like the new baby will. As for your relationship with her, its going to change anyway. Youre having your own baby, she sees you as the reason her life is changing and she will start going through puberty soon. Just try and keep an open line with her. Good Luck!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:27 PM on Nov. 19, 2008

  • This is a great time to teach her about choices. She can have ONE but not all of them OR you can tell her the choices from which she can choose. Teach her NOW before she gets to be an out of control teen.
    Ten is old enough to sleep in her own bed. I would also consider locking my bedroom door while I had sex! There are some things we don't want to teach them at ten!
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:28 PM on Nov. 19, 2008

  • Holy cow. Who runs your home? You and your husband, or the 10 year old? She sounds like a great manipulator. Unless you get some support from your husband to put his foot down, you're going to have an uncontrollable teen on your hands.

    I can understand why she would be upset about the baby, but come ON. Sleeping in your bed? Oh, no way! She's 10, not 2. I really feel like you should discuss your concerns with your husband and get some sort of plan together for this child.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:42 PM on Nov. 19, 2008

  • she is pushing her limits to see if you are going to set boundries if you don't then she'll walk all over you. make her apart of the baby process! have her involoved with as much as possible. if she is the only child and has been for 10yrs. she prolly doesn't know how to react to such a big change and she knows full well that things are going to change.
    nikkib4407

    Answer by nikkib4407 at 6:51 PM on Nov. 19, 2008

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