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What would you do in this situation? (LONG)

I'll try to make a long story short. I have a friend (Jen) who I met about 6 months ago. Our families are very similiar as far as income, kids ages, and likes/dislikes. I really had no other friends at the time we met, and neither did she. Our families were hanging out every weekend, and we were doing things during the week while the kids were at school. However, this past weekend DH and I decided to have a few other friends over too, some of the guys he works with and their families. We invited Jen's family over as well, but she said no they didn't want to come over because she was suddenly sick, but come to find out its really because she doesn't like one of the ladies that had come over, and jen had spread rumors (untrue) around the base about this other woman. So now, I have texted Jen multiple times in the past few days and she suddenly doesn't have time to hang out, doesn't have time to talk, and basically doesn't even reply to my texts. I ask her if she is ok and she just replied "ya I'm fine!!!". So what am I supposed to do, have her as my only friend, or not have her as a friend at all because that seems to be what she wants me to choose between. My DH said she prefers to be her friends only friend because she gets jealous. I really feel like I'm back in high school where you have to choose your friends because one friend doesn't like the other. What would you do?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:27 PM on Feb. 24, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • I would contact her from time to time, and let the rest go. If she can only have one friend at a time, she's not your kind of friend. So don't worry about it.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 3:30 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • I would tell hr goodbye. If she is spreading rumors, I wouldn't want a friend like that. Makes me always wonder if she'll spread some about me.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 3:30 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • I would let her go. It's not worth the stress or drama to have a friend like that in your life. Her issues are just that: HER issues. If she can't get past her jealousy then leave it for her to deal with and move on with your other friendships.
    Wandybrine

    Answer by Wandybrine at 3:30 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • She is jealous and sounds like she is still stuck in high school let her be quit texting her

    ExtremlyUnique

    Answer by ExtremlyUnique at 3:31 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • The same thing you do in high school make a clear decision on who and who you shouldn't be friends with which I have an understanding on who you might pick but I don't know. And well dump the one person you don't want to be around or have your family around.
    HypoHeartBaby

    Answer by HypoHeartBaby at 3:32 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • you need to drop her. she isn't a friend, especially not to answer your phone calls or texts. obviously she is still in high school. and your husband is right she is jealous of the friends you have. i would let her make the next move, if she wants your friendship then let her call you.
    lucky35

    Answer by lucky35 at 3:32 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • tell her to grow up and stop being petty
    juliness

    Answer by juliness at 4:01 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • I'm thinking I will just wait til she contacts me again, but my daughter is very hurt because she loved her girls and they were super close friends. but now, her kids haven't even gotten to stay the night though they used to stay over every time i asked. Every time my DD asks if her girls can come over, the answer is no, they are too busy. I'm thinking I might ask her if the kids can still come over because my daughter loves them so much, but I think I know the answer to that. Just don't know how to explain it to a 6 YEAR OLD that her friends mom is acting like a 2 year old lol.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:33 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • I wouldn't waste anymore time on her. If she's around spreading rumors about people then she'll more than likely begin spreading rumors about you. Good you found her out in time....
    mom2mybabes

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 4:14 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • I would allow her to feel what she feels, but I would not allow her to control my actions with those feelings....In other words...you have texted her, and she doesn't want contact, so don't contact her.....I would be open to the friendship if she changes her mind, but I would not drop other friendships based on her insecurities or behavior, etc....
    Anna92464

    Answer by Anna92464 at 4:17 PM on Feb. 24, 2011