Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

What is the big deal???

my husband and i trust each other fully. we have been married almost 14 years with 2 kids. ever since i only talk to people i have gone to school with and people i know, he's telling me no to sex. we love each other conditionally. he says that fb causes trouble. I would never reuin our marriage nor devastate my kids anyway shaporform. i am not dating any males, hanging out with any male. what do u think??
't

Answer Question
 
diamondsarecool

Asked by diamondsarecool at 4:25 PM on Feb. 24, 2011 in Relationships

Level 16 (2,942 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • You mean you love each other unconditionally right? How does FB cause trouble? Seems weird.
    prettyinink2011

    Answer by prettyinink2011 at 4:27 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • My DH feels the same way about FB. I had a page for a week and although it was innocent I didn't even really feel right. He didn't like it so I got rid of the page. There are a lot of accounts of failed marriages because of fb. I don't have an opinion except that FB isn't that important to me or those that are on it. It doesn't bother me not to have a FB account.
    I don't know the situation with you and your DH, but maybe just talk to him. Maybe there is a separate trust issue that your not aware of. Ask him his reasonings and why he feels so strongly about it. Maybe there is a comprimise.
    Roisin07

    Answer by Roisin07 at 4:29 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • maybe hes getting insecure?
    Sahaira

    Answer by Sahaira at 4:29 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • Is he saying no to sex cause you have a FB??

    Christieluv0614

    Answer by Christieluv0614 at 4:30 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • DH and I both have a Facebook. We know each other's passwords and he can log on and look at mine anytime if he wants to. Sometimes we even end up on each other's page if one of us forgets to logout or something. Is your DH like this with other things? Would he be ok with you going out with friends without him or does that make him uncomfortable, too? I think he is either the jealous type who just thinks you will get caught up in something whether it's online or out at the bar or the mall, or he has some reason to think FB leads to bad things- like he knows a friend who cheated that way or something. Talk to him about it, maybe offer to give him your password. If I had to choose between FB and DH I would choose my DH but I would not appreciate that he didn't trust me. And especially if you have given him no reason not to trust you and always been faithful.
    MaryMW

    Answer by MaryMW at 4:34 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • I agree with Mary. I also believe that marriages that break up over Facebook were doomed anyway; there was just an electronic push.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 4:44 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • are you talking with males? i think there is another reason for the way he feels not that it's just fb on it's own. that doesn't mean that you should stop having a page but for him to figure out the real issue and you guys discuss it.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 4:48 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • i'm not talking about us getting any divorce. Our marriage isn't doomed. he knows he has no reasons not to trust me in anyways. he doesn't care if i would meet up with other old girl friends from school etc. i think its the other males he doesn't trust. he might think there's a chance somene may do something wrong to me and he wouldn't beable to save me. he thinks people on facebook causes problems with other people. i have blocked people against my account. he knows thatcause i had him read the posts. I know i spend alotof time on fb, cm.i'm putting more attention on fb,cm instead of him i gather. also get way behind on house-keeping which he does help with. we are due to have our own date night out. hard when you have kids.
    diamondsarecool

    Comment by diamondsarecool (original poster) at 4:54 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • Tell him that life can cause trouble. It's about the people not the location. He needs to be more confident in himself and his marriage. That's just silly limiting trouble to FB.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:56 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • FB can bring about a lot of insecurities in relationships. Sounds like you and your husband need to talk. If you're corresponding suddenly with old boyfriends or old crushes, he may just feel slightly intimidated. If that is what you're doing, then give him your password and log-in, tell him he's free to check everything out. If you're not comfortable with that, ask yourself if what you're doing on FB would make you uncomfortable if the shoe were on the other foot.
    amybaby_19

    Answer by amybaby_19 at 4:57 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN