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3 Bumps

MIL is not allowed this time ( kinda long)

Last time I let my MIL be in the room when I gave birth to my DD and I told her this time she is welcome too. Well, she didnt show up at my baby shower this time, she made a bullshit excuse. She said she didnt have the money for gas to come down (15 miles away). She has known about the baby shower for 2 months and obviously could have saved $10 for gas. She bragged two weeks ago about how big her commissions are at work and that their tax return was huge. She is a very jelous person and I know she was jelous that her MIL was throwing me a baby shower. (however my MIL never even offered ) So now I told my husband that this time when I give birth, she is not welcome in the room and thats it. He is mad at me because he thinks its unnecessary for me to do that. I think it is. When we first told her we were pregnant again, she said "oh, another one? you guys are crazy. why would you do that?" it was an unplanned pregnancy. I dont like her attitude and how its always her way or no way. So what do you think? Did I go too far with not letting her in the room this time.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:48 PM on Feb. 24, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (15)
  • If she's in the room you are going to be focused on that instead of the task on hand.  No I would not allow her in the room.  And hub isn't the one who has to give birth so I would tell him to shutty shutty.

    MrsHouston47302

    Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 11:50 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • No you sure didn't. It is your decision who you want in there with you.
    LeslieNBreaux

    Answer by LeslieNBreaux at 11:51 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • If u don't like it then just don't let her
    A11

    Answer by A11 at 11:52 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • I think that two wrongs don't make a right. If you have already told her she is welcome in the room, it is just spiteful to change your mind. What is alienating her going to accomplish? Nothing but making the distance between her son and her greater. Not worth it in my book.
    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 11:54 PM on Feb. 24, 2011

  • I think u r completely right about your decison to keep ther MIL out of the room. But it may make things worse then they already are. She might be bitching about u to her son about how selfish u r, blah,blah ect. Then that may make your life with your dh a little more strained and excess needless tension. I would be biting my tongue and saying thru clenched teeth and say in the most sweetest voice u can manage, and "U know you are always welcome to come to the hospital and see your other grandchild" Using the backwords psychology on her can make u look good in your dh eyes and completly astonish and confuse her. Then maybe next time u plays like a bitch your dh will hopefully stand up for u if it looks like u r meeting the MIL half way and she will end up looking like a selfish bitch..
    Michigan-Mom74

    Answer by Michigan-Mom74 at 12:01 AM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • During both of my deliveries, I only had my husband in the room. I refused to let anyone else to be in there. When asked, I just said "oh no, only my hubby!!!" =)
    sherribeare

    Answer by sherribeare at 1:34 AM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • Do what you feel, you need to do, it is Your baby.
    SissyAnn141

    Answer by SissyAnn141 at 1:50 AM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • It's completely up to you who you let in the room, you do what you need to do to have a happy and stress free birth. I think it's completely fine to refuse her in the room!
    pixiestix21

    Answer by pixiestix21 at 2:46 AM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • If you are upset with her and her presence in the room will cause you stress, she can't be there. Anyone else will just have to understand that.
    mandaday

    Answer by mandaday at 4:13 AM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • I think your husband needs to sit down and have a little talk with his mother. It doesn't matter if she is in the room. I kinda doubt she was even planning to show up based on what you said. What matters is if she is going to spend the next 20-50 years playing favorites and pissing you off. Nip this in the bud. This is not a small little one day decision. This is a MIL who needs to be slapped.
    LoveMyDog

    Answer by LoveMyDog at 7:19 AM on Feb. 25, 2011

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