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People in the labor room more of a vent I guess.

OK, long story as short as I can.
Back about 7 years ago my SIL was having my first niece. We let them know that we wanted to be there (at the hospital) to just be there in case they needed anything. Such as if Daddy needed a hamburger or whatever.
We had no intention of being in the Labor room.
when we got there we asked if we could come in to say Hello. It was a planned day for my SIL to be induced, so when we got there she wasn't really even in labor yet. We said hello and headed to the lounge. They both seemed nervous and asked is to stay and talk. So we did.
They had us in there for a while, and at one point we got up to give them some space. When we came back my SIL was very upset that we had left and wanted us to stay. Her labor at this point was getting harder. I wasn't going to leave and upset her, so we stayed.
To this day she still tells stories of how her birth experience with her first child was so horrible, that so many people pushed there way into the room and took what should have been a wonderful experience from her.
Anyone who was at that hospital was invited by her. As for being in the room, no one WANTED to be in the room, if anyone tried to leave she got upset.
Heck, my husband was even having sympathy pains.
Maybe this is more of a vent because I would never tell her what actually went down. I mean, she was a woman in labor!
When my niece's god mother showed up she started giving my SIL heck for choosing a hospital so far away. I'm the one that took that woman out into the hall and told her to lay off.
When my nieces heart rate was falling below the red line, my DH and I that and got the nurses because my BIL (babies daddy) thought it was normal.
The nurses told me it was a good thing I did let them know. Turned out my niece has the cord wrapped around her neck.

I'll never say anything to them about it, but sometimes I just feel the need to vent on here because it gets me how my SIL can just bad mouth me like that.
note: it's not just this, this woman seems to be very out of touch with reality and in truth I'm starting to worry about her.
one day something is fine, the next week I can get emails chastising me to doing something that she herself said was fine, or in fact I was asked to do by either her or her husband!
Guess I'm just a frustrated woman :(

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:30 AM on Feb. 25, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • she sounds like she has some kind of defect with reality... u didnt do anything wrong if she asked u to stay and from what u said u and ur dh tried to leave a few times bc it was uncomfortable.... its annoying to have to deal with im sure... i sympathize with u for having a crazy sil

    Answer by zperez0809 at 11:32 AM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • My son was an emergency C-section 7.5 years ago. My daughter was a planned C-section almost 4 years ago. As time goes by I'm finding that I really DON'T remember much about either birth because of the drugs I'd been given. Is it *possible* that her recollections are altered for the same reason?

    I'm not condoning her actions at all, the do seem a little out there, just trying to raise a different point of view.

    Answer by Rosehawk at 11:35 AM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • You know, I think you need to tell her how things actually happened. Or tell her there is NOTHING that can be done to change it, and if she's having trouble dealing with her past, then she really ought to talk to a therapist.

    Frankly, it sounds like she's a drama queen... and I have a feeling she knows PRECISELY how the birth happened but has edited the memory for re-telling so she can look like a martyr.

    I think I would withdraw from her. Yeah, she's your sister in law. So?

    Answer by gdiamante at 11:42 AM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • "Is it *possible* that her recollections are altered for the same reason?" I'm sure they are. That's why I would never say anything about it. If that was the only issue she complains about then I really wouldn't have a problem. I'm frustrated with her for many reason, most of which I would write a book about . She does this with all kinds of thing. I can call and ask should I bring a certain pie, and she'll say "it doesn't matter, you don't have to if you don't want to. Up to you" Then I get there and find 2 pies of the same type on the counter, and then I get emails telling me I over stepped my bounds. Or I can ask if I should bring chocolate ice cream, she's say "oh yes, I LOVE that kind!" then a few days later my frustrated BIL tells me not to bring that kind anymore because he'd been listening to her complain about how much she hates it. thanks for listening to me gripe ladies.


    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:44 AM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • You may want to remind her that you remember her getting upset when you did leave the room and how you notified the nurse when things didn't look right to you on the monitor. Maybe you can also get her a bottle of fish oil. It's supposed to help improve memory. It seems that she may have difficulty with remembering things in general.

    I'd double check that she really wants what she's saying she wants. My MIL does stuff like that. It turns out she has low blood salt which makes her confused. I hope your SIL doesn't have a medical reason for her not remembering.


    Answer by JSD24 at 11:45 AM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • "I think I would withdraw from her. Yeah, she's your sister in law. So? "

    believe me, there have been so many times that I would love to. but she is wife of my husband's brother whom he wants to have the best relationship possible with. She is also the mother of my two beautiful nieces who mean everything to me, and I want to be there for them. I've been around since day one and can't see walking out the door.

    it's all a long story. But for the most part no matter how much of a aggrivation this woman may be, seeing my nieces light up when they see me is always worth it.

    I mean, if I walk out the door, who is going to sing the part of ursela when they play little mermaid?

    families, what do you do with them?


    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:49 AM on Feb. 25, 2011

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