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S it illegal to take your child out of the state (NM) and relocate to TX, if the father says not to take him?

I'm planning on separating from my husband. We'd talked bout it this last week and last night out of despertion he said it ws illegal o take my son back to TX with out his concent. He had previously said yes take him, bu I don't think he had taken me seriously at that point. I don't want to just up and go or get charged wih kidnapping, but I didn't thik it was illegal to tak emy so with me if I moved. Please some one help me, I'm all set to leave this weekend and I need answers ASAP!!!!!!

Answer Question

Asked by Christina8099 at 3:19 PM on Feb. 25, 2011 in Relationships

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • Youre well within your rights as long as there is not a custody order in place. I left my older kids dad and went from KY where we both attended college to NC. He also didnt want me to leave the state. My lawyer said as long as there is no custody order or anything written and signed by both parents then both parents have equal rights to the children and can leave with them anywhere they want to. The only time you cannot is if you end up with a court order for custody that says you have to have his or the courts permission. If you do this though, after you leave be sure to have something in writing before the first visit takes place, because like I said he has the right to take them back too.

    Answer by gemgem at 3:22 PM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • Depends on the custody order. If there is none, it's not illegal. If there is a custody order that requires you to stay in state, then you must stay in state.

    Answer by gdiamante at 3:23 PM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • You may need to wait...if he's the father and your married then you may have to take him to court and get a judgement so you can leave the state... look into your states laws but if i were you I wouldnt go till i talked to a judge.

    Answer by Finkette at 3:23 PM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • If your married and there is not a custody order in place then your allowed to.

    Answer by jenn4443 at 3:24 PM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • call and ask a lawyer they usually have free consultaions

    Answer by L0vingMy3Girls at 3:25 PM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • Thank you ladies, that's what I thought. I am learning something about him being able to file a restraining order that requires the child to stay here but I'm free to go. Which would make no sense i leaving my son behind. The scary thing is he has a few police friends and I'm scared of what they might do on his behalf.

    Comment by Christina8099 (original poster) at 3:26 PM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • I am learning something about him being able to file a restraining order that requires the child to stay here but I'm free to go.

    He can do that and you would be charged with kidnapping. He can also go to court and get custody after you leave. You need to contact an attorney.


    Answer by matthewscandi at 3:29 PM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • You need answers from an attorney and not by strangers on a board who may or may not have legal experise. To be sure you're within your rights, contact an attorney or try to work it out with your husband to take the child out of state. I'm pretty sure that a judge would not like to hear that you received legal advice from CafeMom, telling you that you're within your rights to take your child to another state without your husbands approval...

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 3:45 PM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • Even with a restraining order he has to have proof you are harming the child. They dont issue them just because you might move. Been there done that. At worst he can get an emergency order and then 10 days later you have a hearing in District court and explain to the judge why he did this. The judge would likely drop it unless he has some sort of proof you were a child abuser who shouldnt be with your son.
    Now he COULD get an ex parte motion for custody giving him custody of your son and use the fact you stated you are moving as a basis for the order. However, most times a judge wants to see you actually have moved and refuse visits. Even then again 10 days later you go to court and explain why you moved.

    Source: years of child custody battles.
    Mil is a paralegal for a family lawyer
    2 friends work for a family lawyer

    Answer by gemgem at 3:50 PM on Feb. 25, 2011

  • you can unless he has it court ordered that you can't.

    Answer by notjstasocermom at 5:55 PM on Feb. 25, 2011

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