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Can I have advice please! Sorry it's pretty long adult content

My husband and I recently moved in together. I hope I put this the right way and not try to sound vain or anything but I'm the type of woman who like to look nice when company is over. I don't know NONE of my husbands navy buddies and when he invite them over, without telling me, I'm always in housewife mode. You cooking,cleaning, fu**king rag on my head no makeup. lol I feel very uncomfortable that his buddies are here. I told him please give me a heads up that your friends are coming and all he says "babe, you look fine why do you need to be all pretty to meet my friends?" I've meet his friends on six times and all those times I was looking a hot ass mess. All he does is laugh about! Today was the last straw. My husband gets a car so he's gonna teach me how to drive. Yet again I'm in a scarf, t-shirt and pjs on. He tells me that his friend is gonna give him a car radio. I tell him ok I'm going upstairs, call me when your friend leave. He tells me "no it's ok! He's just giving me the radio and that's that". So I'm still in the car, his friend comes with his wife and two other friends! I'm trying to hide lol and my husband brings all of them to me! My husband knows I'm uncomfortable and starts smiling. So when his friends leave he starts to laugh at me! I'm done with this shit! What should I do?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:12 PM on Feb. 27, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • Tell him you're serious about it. But if he says you look fine without getting dolled up, he's probably telling the truth.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 7:14 PM on Feb. 27, 2011

  • lol... men He sees you as beautiful all the time. I wouldnt be to mad at him. Everyone is a hot mess on the weekends and at home. Ive had the stomach flu since tuesday.. my husband and anyone that came by saw me with week old bed head and a messy house. Oh well....
    MKSers

    Answer by MKSers at 7:15 PM on Feb. 27, 2011

  • I know what ya mean, not sure why he is getting a chuckle out of it & just respect your feelings...I don't like looking like hell when someone comes over and when ya have 2 kids looking like hell comes alot easier these days especially with the bags alone from not sleeping! tell him you are serious that you want to know about plans right away.
    sarasmommy777

    Answer by sarasmommy777 at 7:18 PM on Feb. 27, 2011

  • Sorry for the crappy writing! My iPhone is lagging!

    I don't like it though! Lol sometimes his friends look at me like "this thing is his wife" is pretty embarrassing
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:21 PM on Feb. 27, 2011

  • We have one child and she is a firecracker! Right now he's out! He always leave me her by myself and wonders why I'm angry all the time.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:23 PM on Feb. 27, 2011

  • Well I'm sometimes guilty of this but actually it's your fault REMEMBER when leaving the house look decent never know who you might run into. At home is a little different but now I try to look decent even at home put on cloths comb your hair you don't have to curl it and wear make up but look nice but comfy.
    Because first impression last and im sure the remember what you looked like the last time they saw you. You can do house work and look nice at the same time put on casual cloths maybe lipstick and go about your business but NEVER leave home looking tacky....I know been there and done that.
    dusty1962

    Answer by dusty1962 at 7:49 PM on Feb. 27, 2011

  • When I'm going out I ALWAYS look good. Even if it's just to buy some tampons LOL
    like I said I have a 3 year old who is all over the place!
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:53 PM on Feb. 27, 2011

  • It sounds like this is a game to him. He knows it pushes your buttons and thinks it is funny. He is being insensitive to your feelings and it doesn't speak well for his character. I would make it a policy not to go out the door with him, unless you feel you are presentable if he takes you to a friend of his. Second, I would give him a calender and tell him he has to mark the day 24 hours in advance before any friends can come over. If he doesn't give you advance notice, then they might find that the door is locked when they come over and he can explain to them why they will not be allowed in the house. There is no reason you have to hide out in your own home because he is so discourteous and disrespectful to you.
    spottedpony

    Answer by spottedpony at 7:55 PM on Feb. 27, 2011

  • if you know he's gonna drop in on you with folks, then don't ever be in the hot mess mode. get dolled from get go. Simple fix.

    Tell ya what, do that, getting dolled up for a week straight and then sit down and talk to him about this.
    isabellalecour

    Answer by isabellalecour at 9:10 PM on Feb. 27, 2011

  • I have found that it's best to always look presentable "just in case". If you don't get dressed, do your hair and make-up, that's when company will show up unexpectedly. Try to get in the habit of dressing everyday and then you'll never be embarrassed. It's worked for me!
    etexmom

    Answer by etexmom at 9:00 AM on Feb. 28, 2011

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