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How do I ask my husband to move out?

My husband and I have no relationship. I don't love him anymore, our children are grown but he is unemployed and makes no money. I have a good job and can support myself. He is no longer what I need...I need and want someone to take care of me. I tried to work things out but he didn't even want to go to counseling. Also I was the only one that tried. But I am not longer interested in him. He has been out of work since before Christmas with no end in sight. What would you do???

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Asked by lindab56 at 7:21 PM on Jul. 8, 2008 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Usually if it were the other way around it would be the husband to leave. If a wife had no job, where would she go? Same with him, he has no job so where is he suppose to go? You are the one with the job so it would be you to have to leave, especially since you feel he's not doing his job with you. You can't have you cake and eat it too. UNLESS, you OWN the house or YOU"RE the only one on the lease. Then yes he would have to leave.
    Because he's a man doesn't make this any different. You are unhappy then you leave.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:56 PM on Jul. 8, 2008

  • these type of situtations are never easy i think u have been more than patient with your husband. just be careful tell him u need 2 speak 2 him start nice if he doesn't reason 2 the decision ur making u know the next step is going thru the courts...

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:47 PM on Jul. 8, 2008

  • I think it does make a difference who leaves. I pay the rent at our apt he has no way to do that or meet any of the bills. the only recourse is for him to move in with one of our kids. they have lived with us why not the other way around (their dad live with them). Neither one of us are happy. His solution to this is just to be roommates.

    Answer by lindab56 at 10:19 PM on Jul. 8, 2008

  • just because he doesnt have a job doesnt mean you should leave him. BUT if you are not happy for other reason that his lack of employment at the time and have talked with him numerous times about it Tell him! Tell him practically owrd for word what you wrote above, you state your issue, support and give a solution for yourself. You already know what you want now you have to have the balls to go through with it

    Answer by ReneeLRS at 10:43 PM on Jul. 8, 2008

  • Maybe give him a certain amount of time for him to get a job at anything. I think you are feeling like some husbands may feel. He's home and you're working and it seems like he's not doing anything. And maybe he's not. It's a common problem couples have that can lead the one that's working into an affair with a coworker. Yeah you see the cw everyday, yeah they are dressed up, yeah they have a job, yeah you have converstions things that you spouse at the moment isn't doing or have. If he's home at least I hope he's watching the kids. Then in that case he does have a job. He is a SAHDad. SInce it's bothering you then you should speak up, otherwise how will he know how you feel. He's no mind reader ya know

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:03 PM on Jul. 9, 2008

  • Just an update. I know its been a long time I had a breakdown about a month ago. My daughter wouldnt let me see my grandkids and my husband wouldnt move out of our apt. Anyway ended up in a rehab hospital for people with severe depression,etc. for a week.. They helped me understand, along with the support of my cousin, brother and aunt, that I needed to do what was best for me. After I left the hospital I stayed a few days with my cousin . My husband moved out that weekend. I know I don't love him anymore and don't see myself with him. I am not attracted to him in any way and see myself without him for the rest of my life. I did buy a t-shirt a few days after I left the hospital that says "Lets talk about what you can do for ME!!" I recommend one for everyone who has been through anything like I have been. Thanks for the responses.

    Answer by lindab56 at 12:01 PM on Sep. 13, 2008

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