Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

My 4 yr. old doesn't want to start school. What to do??

Our 4 yr. old daughter will start school this Aug. But just the mention of school and she starts going off...."I hate school" and "please,Please don't send me to school". I've been home with her since she was born. No babysitters or any other form and child care except being with her grandparents on occasion. I think that the reason why she doesn't want to go is because she's afraid of being away from me. Any kind of advice would be helpful!! Thank You!!


Asked by sunshinecin at 5:20 PM on Feb. 28, 2011 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 4 (38 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (19)
  • My son went through this it will pass we did a meet and greet with his teacher & once he seen and met some of the other children he was fine

    Answer by ExtremlyUnique at 5:22 PM on Feb. 28, 2011

  • Have you asked her straight out why she "hates" school? Maybe she is afraid or maybe she has heard something bad about school?

    Answer by mslksdh at 5:22 PM on Feb. 28, 2011

  • You just make her go. None of my kids wanted to go and for the same reasons yours doesnt. They do cry but after a week or so they start asking YOU to go home lol. That was always sad for me but I knew was what we had to do. Kids dont WANT to go to school when they can stay home with mom all day and play. Think about it lol. You just make her and tell her well too bad we all have jobs in life, and now your job is to go to school.

    Answer by gemgem at 5:22 PM on Feb. 28, 2011

  • must be just me, but I don't believe in sending a child to school until the last minute.
    sounds like she's not ready, and all to often when kids are sent before they are ready, they have to repeat a grade either earlier or later.

    once you start, then it's hard to try and undo it all.

    I'd just wait to send her, she's made it clear she doesn't want to go. could she start nursery school a few times a week to try it out? I assume you are talking about kindergarten

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:34 PM on Feb. 28, 2011

  • Don't call it school?

    Answer by Trekkie at 5:44 PM on Feb. 28, 2011

  • Is there a way that you could take her to a daycare for half a day once a week? Or maybe a dance or gymnastics class where you are not in the room? I think that if she saw that life without mommy could actually be "cool" and got the sense of having friends and socializing with other kids, it might help with the fear of going away for school. It would also show her that you are always there waiting for her afterward...which could be the source of anxiety on its own. Good Luck!

    Answer by Mom-2-3-Girlz at 6:37 PM on Feb. 28, 2011

  • Maybe you can take her to the school she will be going to. ask the school if she can see what it is like.


    Answer by HomeAlone45 at 8:44 PM on Feb. 28, 2011

  • My 4 yo was the same way before starting pre school. She met the teachers and saw the class before school started, and was just fine. She looked forward to playing with all of the toys. She LOVES going.


    Answer by KairisMama at 8:50 PM on Feb. 28, 2011

  • Im not crazy about putting DD in preK ... But she is practically begging to go to school.. so sadly for me (lol) we have agreed she can go 2 days a week in the fall.
    my advice.... get her social.. go to the park alot, take her to library time for her age group.. go to a church that has daycare during service (its just like school, but much smaller bites). play school at home. let her know its about going to play & learn. talk to see what her exact fears are & try to talk thru them or if possible get her thru the fear before school. if u can afford put her in daycare 1/2 day 1 day a week. or something.
    If she isnt ready & she doesnt has to go.. keep her home another year if its Prek. But if its Kindergarten then try to send her.. Sending her to 1st grade her 1st time in school would be TOUGH!

    Answer by MommaTasha1003 at 11:13 PM on Feb. 28, 2011

  • Let her wait until she's ready. What's the rush?

    Answer by TwilightMack at 11:03 AM on Mar. 1, 2011