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what to i say to my 15 year old sister... SHE IS PREGNANT!

she's 15 and been with the guy almost 9 months.... hes only 16 (just turned 16) adn does not have a job... they are both still kids(even mentally) please what do i say to her.. without acting like its all good... but still be there for her?

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Asked by youngandafraid at 7:49 PM on Jul. 8, 2008 in Pregnancy

Level 5 (102 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • I have been in your shoes.... THREE times with three of my younger sisters.

    Just be supportive and gently continue to advise her that it not going to be a piece of cake and you are there to support her. She will start realizing this on her own without you, and will hopefully start to grow up and be responsible.

    You can't tell her that it is a mistake because of the resentment she may have for your words after the baby is born.


    Answer by girlneffy at 7:54 PM on Jul. 8, 2008

  • I was fifteen when I first got pregnant lol I remember my mom flipped a chair over and sat in her car for about two hours complaing to the babys dad. It all worked out really well though. It's obviously not the best situation to be in but in time everything will turn out so great. I was fine with everyone being mad and disappointed they had a right to be but now they love my daughter and see it as a blessing. I hope everything turns out for the best!

    Answer by xljessnicolelx at 8:02 PM on Jul. 8, 2008

  • Please be supportive, tell her she has to make her own choices about the baby and what she plans to do, abort, relinquish or even parent. If she decides to parent tell her you'll stand behind her and encourage her. All she needs right now is support to know everyone doesn't hate her.

    Answer by lillie023 at 8:36 PM on Jul. 8, 2008

  • if my sister were in this situation, i would tell her that she needs to give the baby up for adoption so it could have the best life possible. if she were mature enough, she and the father would have jobs. i got pregnant when i was 18 and i learned the hard way. im 21 now but it was hard for a while. my husband got a degree in college and we do very well and im able to be a stay at home mom. but we both worked from the beginning. yes, you should be supportive BUT she will not fully grasp what is going on until she actually has the baby, she doesnt have the mental capacity at this age. i didnt know how it was going to be and i was 2 years older than her. if she wants to keep the baby then she needs to get a job and the father does too. if she does want to see the baby then there is always open adoption.
    on the other hand, if she keeps the baby then it may turn out great. everyone loves a baby!

    Answer by annak4404 at 10:45 PM on Jul. 8, 2008

  • i hope that it turns out ok, i really do! best of luck to you and your sister! and i wasnt trying to be harsh, my best friends sister is 15 and has 2 kids and had to drop out of school is is struggling because she is still a kid herself!

    Answer by annak4404 at 10:45 PM on Jul. 8, 2008

  • Be there for her.
    Let her know you will Help her and be there for her if she needs you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:10 PM on Jul. 8, 2008

  • tell her "i love you and i will support you in any decision you make. now you need to grow up enough to make some seriously difficult decisions and i will help you in any way i can." that way she knows you love her. comign down on her, well, it won't change the fact that there's now a baby so don't do it.

    Answer by princezzmommie at 11:36 PM on Jul. 8, 2008

  • for the guy tell him to take the CHSPE and have her go to charter school i know san diego charter is a great school and you go 2 times a week for 2 hours or the American school that way they can have a life and he can go to work

    Answer by Patience1 at 12:18 AM on Jul. 9, 2008

  • regardless of what you NOT preach to her, she knows she screwed up. Be there for her..she needs you. Bad mouthing the Dad is detrimental. Don't enable further poor decisions..just let her know you still love her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:26 AM on Jul. 9, 2008

  • Don't chastise her, be supportive. She needs all the love and support she can get. Trust me... I'm sure she knows she screwed up. Is there a chance that she'd adopt the baby out to a loving family? So many wonderful people are waiting for a child, and it is such a wonderfully selfless thing to do. Please don't let her compund her situation by having an abortion. It's not a "way out", as many would like her to believe. If she's willing to parent the child, then she should be commended for that, and helped out in any way possible. There is alot of info in my journals about help for young girls like her and feel free to PM me if there's anything I can do to help.

    Answer by Luvmylilmonkies at 9:01 AM on Jul. 9, 2008

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