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3 Bumps

Advice please..

My husband is in the military. He has to pick orders tomorrow! He always wanted to go to japan BUT I feel he only wants to go is because his best friend is stationed there. He tells me that's not the case but whatever. My husband has a history of being unfaithful. Even though things are great now, I'm always gonna have trust issues. I don't want to go to Japan because I'm afraid he's gonna cheat and my daughter and I will be stranded. Even though he has not cheated, it leaves a scar on me. I would like to move out to Cali but his ex jumpoff(Not Girlfriend)is stationed there! He wants my input on where to go but I can't make the decision. Can anyone who has been in my shoes give me some advice please and thanks.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:13 PM on Mar. 1, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • You're living from fear. You have to stop that. It's ruining your life. Don't go into the situation thinking the worst. Which place will be best for the family? Would you like to experience a new culture? Sounds like a great opportunity to go to Japan... Take the friend and ex out of the equation and then make the choice.

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 5:18 PM on Mar. 1, 2011

  • I had a friend go to Okinowa (not sure of spelling) and she ABSOLUTELY loved it. Go to Japan and experience it. Not everyone gets an opportunity like that. You have to let go of the mistrust or get out of the marriage. If you forgive him, forgive him and drop it. If something happens once you get there, he will have to pay for you to move if he is unfaithful but that shouldn't even come into mind. Enjoy your marriage and the experience. With being in military, you two pretty much only have each other when you have to move around like that.

    Answer by huntin_mama at 7:18 PM on Mar. 1, 2011

  • Go with your deepest instint, always follow your instint.
    Write a list of pros and cons of each place and go with the best but I agree with the others its time now to literally trust him completly -I know this will be really hard or jump off ship and be ready to start a new life
    Where will you be most happy?????

    Answer by 21lisa72 at 8:33 PM on Mar. 1, 2011

  • Thank you so much! This helps out a lot.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:20 PM on Mar. 1, 2011

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