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My 12 month old throws tantrums. How should I handle them?

How should I handle tantrums with my 1 year old? What I have been doing, but not sure if it's the right way to handle it, is I have been giving her a light pat on the bottom and sitting her on the couch and saying: "No tantrums" in a firm, but kind voice.
Sometimes I know why she is throwing a tantrum. Those reasons are because she expected to be picked up and I didn't pick her up. Or she wants something that someone else has. Or she wants something that she is not allowed to have. Sometimes it's a mini tantrum that is thrown because she can't do something and needs help. In which case, I say: "do you need help?" and then help her. And sometimes she throws a tantrum and I'm not sure why at all. She will be playing with a toy and just get frustrated. My husband says that I need to discipline for tantrums. And I agree. But, I don't know what discipline is developmentally appropriate for a 1 year old. She just turned 1 on February 18.

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CaptivatedByGod

Asked by CaptivatedByGod at 1:27 PM on Mar. 2, 2011 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 6 (108 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • Good question! LOL I have a 15 month old and she throws theeee biggest fits sometimes and smacks me in the face. Sometimes I can't help but laugh at her and sometimes I just look at her with my serious mom face and say LAURYN NO NO! Then she'll be upset with me for 5 minutes and continue playing or whatever... Idk it's hard to really disipline younger ones :/ What do you do!?
    seecb

    Answer by seecb at 1:32 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • Exactly seecb! It's very difficult to know what to do. On one hand, I don't want her tantrums to get out of hand. And on the other, I don't want to over discipline either. My son is 4.5 and he only threw two tantrums in his first 2 years of life. Now, he throws them all the time and I have no problem swatting his bottom for them or sitting him in a time out for 5 minutes. He is old enough to use words. But, I feel like I have no clue what to do with my youngest. I feel like a new mom!
    CaptivatedByGod

    Comment by CaptivatedByGod (original poster) at 1:36 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • Ok so here's what I did and it seemed to work. At 8 mos DD started "misbehaving" an I knew she was little, but I really didn't want to use force. So I would put her in my lap and hold her arms gently but firmly for a 30 sec "time-out". I knew she was too young to understanding sitting in a chair for a time-out but I didn't know what else to do. And they say a good rule is to do one minute of time out for each year - so I did 30-45 sec since she was under a year at the time. Most kids hate being restrained, so it had the right effect with out being "hitting". Now DD is 2 we can do time-out in a chair, but if she is having just one of "those" days I will still occaisionally give her a lap time-out. Also make sure to tell them you love them when the time-out is over. I usually give a kiss (if on my lap) and tell he ok - go play. Once they are verbal also ask for an apology. Good luck
    NHRachel

    Answer by NHRachel at 4:58 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • I always walk away from my 18 month old son when he is having a fit. I always felt anger tantrums were for attention or to get his way. By not giving him the results he's looking for, I have found the tantrums are much fewer and shorter-lived. If it is a tantrum born of frustration, I would remove him from the situation or take away the toy and redirect his attention.
    hootie826

    Answer by hootie826 at 5:09 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

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