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S/o of "don't kids have the right to choose" regarding religious beliefs

for those of you who think taking your children to your church is depriving them of letting them choose their own religion, or (and i say this with disgust) "shoving your beliefs down their throat", what then is the proper way to approach religion and your children?

is a parent suppose to abandon their church & their religious beliefs until the child has made their own decision?

i personally believe by taking your children to church with you, and allowing them to learn one religion in particular, is actually helping them make a more informed decision when they reach that crossroad. atleast they are properly educated on one religion.

 
tnm786

Asked by tnm786 at 4:15 PM on Mar. 2, 2011 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 43 (159,608 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (46)
  • I disagree with you, and here's why. If you ONLY expose a child to one religion, and basically tell them all other religions are false, how is that allowing them to make an informed decision. I completely understand people wanting to take their children to church with them, and teaching them about their religion, but I also believe those same people should teach their kids the basics of other religions, WITHOUT PREJUDICE.

    I'm an atheist, so is my husband. We will expose our children to the basics of all major religions, and let them decide from there.
    Anouck

    Answer by Anouck at 4:18 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • Okay I'm speaking from being a preachers grand daughter..I was made to go to church all my life, I hated every minute of it, I hold it against my parents to this day, I'm a non believer to this day as well.
    My husband is a preachers son (we both were raised in the same religion) and was made to go and he hated it as well..we both are the black sheep of the family now obviously.
    We have decided it's in our sons best interest if we don't make him go and he can choose for himself later in life. Right now he's too young and I don't think it's necessary. I saw a lot of scary things in church and would never want him to be as damaged as we are.
    prettyinink2011

    Answer by prettyinink2011 at 4:20 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • I agree with you. I was raised in the church and as an adult I explored different religions. In the end I came back to the Catholic church, but I didnt have to look into its beliefs before finding out if I liked it. I already knew all about it.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 4:18 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • My son's father and I are both Catholic. Our son was baptised in the Catholic church, will receive communion and probably confirmation, like I was and his dad was. I don't really follow the religion anymore, his dad does. When he's old enough, he'll make his own decision. Until then, he's Catholic.
    TARARENEE

    Answer by TARARENEE at 4:18 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • I tend to agree with you.

    We go to synagogue 1-3 times a month. DH and I have also become involved with it in other aspects as well. We also have a kosher home, celebrate holidays, give to charities, etc… We also have discussions about belief and practice. We have always told them that as they grow up and end up on their own, their beliefs and practices are their own. We hope they will continue on the same path we have pointed them down, but ultimately, it is their choice.

    My oldest just turned 13. He is now a legal adult in the Jewish community. We might not like some of the choices he will make for his religion (and life in general) but we have given him to tools with with to choose. And we will respect his decisions.
    balagan_imma

    Answer by balagan_imma at 4:21 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • Personally I think choosing a religion is highly overrated. How many of us would let our children choose their own values without any interference from us? Not many. Because as parents we're guides and examples for our children and it's our job to teach them what we think is right. It's not much different with religion, also a guide to life. IMHO, children feel more secure when they have a clear and consistent guide. It doesn't mean they're not free to question that path and change it if it doesn't fulfill them, but that doesn't mean that it's not our job as parents to show them the path we believe is best.

    Sharon
    momto2boys973

    Answer by momto2boys973 at 6:58 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • My kids are free to believe or or not believe in what ever they want. I will never tell them they must believe in a certain thing.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 4:18 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • makes me shake my head. we make them go to school. when they're older, they choose the college. we raise them the way we see fit, public, private, or homeschool. in the end they make the decision where to go. besides, it's a bad influence to believe in one thing and not enforce it in your home. what message is that sending to the kids? oh yeah, to be hypocritical. i'd rather teach my kids to act on what you believe instead of talking the talk and not walking the walk. kwim? at least i hope i make sense. i'm working on a few broken hours of sleep and 5 cups of coffee due to ds having the flu since sunday night...
    armywife43

    Answer by armywife43 at 4:26 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • I agree with you whole heartedly. Having children doesn't mean we have to abandon our own beliefs and practices and teaching our children is not "depriving" them of anything. My kids can do what ever they want when they are older, but until such a time they will take part in church and family prayer. I'm not leaving young kids home alone while hubby and I go, and I'm not giving up my relationship with God until they are out of the house.
    asmcbride

    Answer by asmcbride at 4:26 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • OP, I suppose it all depends on how hard core the parents are. I know technically, all religions consider theirs the one and only "true" religion, and therefore denounce all other religions, no? Like I said, I think it's completely normal for people to raise their kids according to their own religion, I would just like it if everybody would make an effort to also teach their children about other religions without any kind of prejudice. Actually, I was raised Catholic, and went to a Catholic high school, but we still got taught the basics of all the other major religions out there... I liked that.
    Anouck

    Answer by Anouck at 4:36 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

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