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Alcholic friend

So I finally confronted her about her problem and now she is distant. I am worried for her and I want to help. I wasn't mean spirited. I told her that I adore her and that I am concerned for her. She is trying to get pregnant but she keeps miscarrying because she is on the floor drunk every day. She doesn't have a job, she was raped several years ago, her and her husband are at odds because he might go to jail because he assaulted someone who was taking advantage of her BECAUSE she was sooo drunk...How can I help, or do I just let her go?


Asked by Anonymous at 7:37 PM on Mar. 2, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • this is a difficult question. i've always been told you can't help someone who isn't willing to help themselves. we can't force anyone to get the help they need so desperately. so unless she asks for help, all you can do is pray for her.

    you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink or something like that..

    i'm so sorry you have this burden on your shoulders. Godspeed

    Answer by fordeeperroots at 7:42 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • Try Al-Anon. I'm sure they can help you. good luck.

    Answer by onethentwins at 7:42 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • Have you consulted Al-Anon? It's a support group for the families of alcoholics. Even though you're not family, they can help.

    Answer by gdiamante at 7:42 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • I think you did your best. maybe an intervention would work. but they have to admit themselves that they have a problem. they have to actually hit bottom before they can look up. but like you said, keep in contact, let her know you are there for her if she needs to talk. but like the others said if you find yourself getting upset, AL-ANON helps you to understand her. Been there done that with my dad. sometimes as they say in AA "Let go and Let God".....

    Answer by jbaret at 7:50 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • You cannot force an alcoholic or drug addict to stop. They will NOT change until they are ready to change. All the bitching,lecturing, threats, crying in the world will not change that. You talked to her and that is all you can do. Attend an Al-Anon meeting to help you deal with your friends disease. They will help you out and help you understand the disease of alcoholism.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 7:53 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • do whats best for you , be a good samaritian when it works , a drunk is not themselves everything is acting out of the bottle - and protecting that , dont enable.

    Answer by letstalk747 at 7:43 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • Everyone is telling you exactly what I was going to say. You can try and help her but it will never work until she is ready to help herself.

    Answer by sondaughter312 at 8:18 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

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