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Sex after baby question adult content

Well, okay, after I had my baby. I am just not interested inn sex with my hubby. Most of the time, I am not "in the mood". He whines and complains and tries to initate sex but I would turn him down most of the time. Sometimes I would get mad at him and tell him to go find a hole in the wall if he wants it so bad. Should I be more considerate?

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AlyssaM0mmy

Asked by AlyssaM0mmy at 8:44 PM on Mar. 2, 2011 in Relationships

Level 9 (275 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Well, I understand the feeling. But you might try being more tactful. In my experience? Men become serious babies after a baby is born. Don't ask me what is up with that, but suddenly it seems like they have to know they are still cared for...in a physical way. Right when we are at our most exhausted. You might think about "scheduling" it at least once a week. Sometimes the build up of anticipation makes it seem more special and important to you. Plus, you can concentrate on saving a little energy for the day. :) Good luck!
    blu_canary

    Answer by blu_canary at 8:47 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • lol dont worry....we all go through this. You need to make sure you talk to your dr about this, because quite often, its due to our hormones. Especially after having baby. The guys bodies dont go through anything, but we have to go through 9 months of nothing but body changes, then your milk glands coming in right after the baby is born, then you are lacking sleep because you are up with the baby, plus there's still the house to take care of.....and a lot of the time, if we do have any free time, we want to take a nap. lol. I've found that if you designate some of the house hold duties to him, it will take the load off your back, and just maybe, you will again be in the mood....lol or atleast tell him that. But in the mean time, I would talk to your dr, because sometimes they can give you something to help with the hormones....Good luck!!
    katieandchris01

    Answer by katieandchris01 at 8:50 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • It took ages for me to want sex again after the birth of each of my kids. Sometimes the libido took more than 2 years to return to normal. Be aware that your rejection is probably hurtful to your husband, so consider saying yes sometimes even when you really don't feel like it. You may need some extra lubrication. Make sure Hubby knows you still love him too, by making sure to do other things for him. I make sure we have sex at least once a week, whether I want to or not, just for the sake of our relationship.
    judimary

    Answer by judimary at 8:58 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • This is probably due to a nutritional deficiency. The same vitamins, minerals and fatty acids responsible for sex drive and sexual response are the very ones depleted by pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding. Increasing food sources of zinc, all B vitamins including choline and inositol, arginine, calcium, magnesium, vitamin C, iron and Omega-3 and 6 essential fatty acids will probably help immensely over the course of 4-6 weeks, especially if you reduce sodium and caffiene intake and regulate your stress through prayer, meditation and regular exercise. Sex itself is a stress reliever also.
    Fistandantalus

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 8:14 AM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • no, you sound like me, i have like no sex drive anymore
    Jssg1986

    Answer by Jssg1986 at 9:17 PM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • well how long has it been and if you dont feel like it you dont feel like it maybe try to get yourself into it before you start or just tell him to lay off for a while if he stops bugging you maybe you will be more wanting of it
    mommyof0210

    Answer by mommyof0210 at 9:33 PM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • Thanks everyone. We're trying to compromise. He is jealous of the baby and just feeling left out and unloved. With the baby, she is a handful and I admit, I forget about him sometimes. But I did warn the fool that I wasn't going to be a "perfect wife" and it's his karma for being stuck with me. lol...
    AlyssaM0mmy

    Comment by AlyssaM0mmy (original poster) at 5:33 AM on Mar. 4, 2011

  • With my first baby it was over a year before we were having sex regularly. After my second, it wasn't quite six months. With my first, it was just difficult to adjust to being mommy, up at night nursing and turning that off to be a wife.
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 12:05 PM on Mar. 6, 2011

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