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Has your child been IN a wedding?

My SIL is getting married this summer. My kids are in the wedding as a flower girl and ring bearer. My nephew is also a ring bearer.

Well my DD (she will be 5 at the wedding) is VERY SHY. I know the wedding is going to make her nervous, but she should be fine walking down with her brother and cousin. Well SIL tells me that DD will walk all by herself, right before she walks down. I very nicely explained that this may not go over well because of how Kairi is. I know my DD, and I know she'll freeze having to walk down an aisle, ALONE, with tons of people staring at her. I suggested she let DD walk with the two ring bearers. SIL is just like "oh she'll be fine." Her tone made me think she just doesn't care what I have to say about it. I wonder to myself - HAVE YOU MET KAIRI??? She KNOWS how shy my DD is.

It's her wedding, and if she wants to plan it that way, go for it. Come rehearsel time/wedding day if my DD isn't wanting to walk down that aisle alone, I hope SIL understands it, and lets her walk with her brother. We TRIED nicely warning her.

Have you had any of your little ones in a wedding? How did it go? Were they SHY, not so much?? I am feeling nervous for my DD, and this wedding is months away.

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Asked by KairisMama at 8:52 PM on Mar. 2, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 22 (13,890 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • My now 14 yr old was in my cousins wedding when he was around 3. He did fine at the rehersal but freaked at the wedding and my mom had to carry him down the aisle. He was also in a wedding when he was about 9 and did fine.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 8:54 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • aww, I know how she feels!! When my brother and I were younger, we were in a bunch of But he and I were really close, like best friends, lol...and I can tell you, I always wanted to be with him, and if I werent it was scary!! if I had to walk by myself, I don't think I could have done it....I would ask that maybe they can have another girl walk with her, because it is scary to a kid for all the people staring at them.... But in the least, ask her how she would feel if worse comes to worse, and your DD is too scared to do it alone, askhow she would feel with you holding her hand as she sprinkles the flowers....

    Answer by katieandchris01 at 8:56 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • I have mentioned alternatives in case she freezes, trying to get a feel for which alternative she (SIL) is cool with. All she says is "she'll be fine." It kind of pisses me off in a way. I just want to know she's OPEN to an alternative, for it's good to have a back up plan.


    Comment by KairisMama (original poster) at 9:02 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • My ds was just in my sills wedding, he cried "mommy" the entire way down the aisle even though my hubby was a groomsman waiting for him. Everyone thought it was cute. We had 2 young flower girls, and 2 young ring bearers, one of flower girls were really shy so we gave some gum to my maid of honor(my sister) and told her, if she got all the way to her, she could p have the gum, worked great, except she ran to get the gum, it's little things like this, that make your wedding different than everyone else's....

    Answer by BabyBugsmama at 9:09 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • That's true too. No matter what happens the kids will look adorable. The gum isn't a bad idea. DD LOVES gum.

    Comment by KairisMama (original poster) at 9:12 PM on Mar. 2, 2011

  • I just hope she does well and if not thats ok too.. :)

    Answer by Jessesmomma2009 at 1:26 PM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • Yes!! My 4 year old was just in my brother's wedding this past October. She can be very shy especially in large crowds and since I had just had another baby a month before I wasn't sure how it would go but she did great!! She sat with my parents (me and hubby were also in the wedding) after she walked down the aisle and we told her that if she did a good job she would get something special. My sister in law and brother were amazing with her too. Ava did "walk" down with a ring bearer but they basically walked several feet from each other so she I guess did more or less walk by herself. My SIL was alot more understanding about the situation then your SIL seems. I hope it works out for you!

    Answer by AvaPey0209 at 2:56 PM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • maybe you guys should go over it with your DD and practice, practice, practice. Tell shes sooooo pretty. u know make her head big a little take pictures make her comfortable with it by the time the day comes. Not a guarantee jus a sugestion.

    Answer by BUTTERFLY463 at 7:12 PM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • Even if the kids don't go down it makes CUTE pictures when they get shy or stop half way down the isle.
    My daughter has never been in a wedding. but she is going to me in our wedding this August and she will be Three Sunday.
    She is also shy until she gets to know someone so i don't know how its going to work. We are having someone helping and making sure everyone is okay. Well if she wont go we are going to tell her that Daddy has a dollar in his pocket. (she loves money) You could get her a cheap basket and put flowers in it and tell her what her big job is and let her practice. I also have 4 ring bearars from age 6-1. They are all shy too.

    I'm sure she will do great!! Don't stress over it. Shes a kid. even if you prep her. They do the darnest things when the get in front of people! :)

    Good luck.

    Answer by custer8611 at 6:07 AM on Mar. 9, 2011

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