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11 Bumps

Do you force your kids to say "please" and' Thank you"?

I do remind my kids to say please and thank you but believe that it is WAY more effective to model politeness and thankfulness not just have my kids parrot words.

Here is one mom's take on please and thank you


Asked by pammomof9 at 9:21 AM on Mar. 3, 2011 in General Parenting

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Answers (77)
  • I don't force them but I am polite to them & expect the same from them. If my son yells from the other room "MOM I'M THIRSTY!!!!!" I say that's a shame. Then he thinks for a minute, comes in the room and says "Can I please have milk mommy?" Then I say of course my dear. =) I use please & thank you with them. Please brush your teeth, please pick that up. I think that some parent's have a hard time with getting politness out of children because they don't practice it. There are times when it calls for telling them do this now. But I think when you don't use please & thank you yourself, why would the kids think they should.

    Answer by jfblaine83 at 11:20 PM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • I ENCOURAGE please and thank you -- and demonstrate having nice manners myself, but force it? No.

    Answer by BaileysMom476 at 9:29 AM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • I use manners in my day to day communications, and expect my kiddos to do the same. I have both modeled this and reminded them when they forget. Now they're pretty darned good about doing in on their own,yay!

    Answer by vicesix at 9:33 AM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • Yes. :) My two-year-old daughter is one of the most polite peope I know! She's been saying thanks/thank you for a while now, after everything! You can give her tissue to wipe her nose or give her something to drink, she'll say thank you. She just doesn't know how to say you're welcome, so she'll say thank you back to you when you tell her thank you. lol. She just started saying please, so everytime she wants something she'll say please mama! And then when I do give it to her she says thank you. So sweet. I'm so surprised at how polite she is when she isn't even three yet!

    Answer by poptart0325 at 9:52 AM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • I don't force them, no. I don't sit there and hold back what they want until they say it, I don't think that's right.
    I use "Please" and "Thank You" in everything I ask of them, even when I'm reprimanding them. And my oldest has already started to say it back to me when he asks for stuff. He's two. I find it's a lot easier to model the bahvior and have them follow suit then to bully them into it.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 9:29 AM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • Hubby and I both say please and thankyou which rubs off on the boys, but we also have them say please and thank you when asking for something like milk or a snack and they usually do if you repeat to them like.. "may I please have juice" or "please have juice" for the younger one.

    Answer by shortmommy23 at 9:36 AM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • I guess i force it, if they are rude and do not have manners, then they wil have a time out, but as a military family a rude a disrespectful child is a HUGE embarrassment! And 5 is even

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 10:01 AM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • You are right, kids learn by example, mine learned about saying please and thank you very early on. You can't force anyone to be polite, but you can mold your kids to know the meaning behind it.

    Answer by older at 11:49 AM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • they pick it up from us lol

    Answer by Patience909 at 9:34 AM on Mar. 3, 2011

  • My kids say it when they remember to. I have to remind them from time to time. I wouldn't say I FORCE them to say it. I teach/encourage good manners...

    Answer by SWEETPEAS3MOM at 10:04 AM on Mar. 3, 2011