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what makes it a date anyway?

My daughter is in seventh grade. All of a sudden there are boys calling, and my girl is calling boys, and everything is about who's interested in who. She managed to sneak in a sort of date too. When does it change from a playdate with a boy, to a date, or something sort of in between?
I would certainly never allow my 13 year old to date, but somehow I feel like these "sort of dates" got snuck past me. What situations have you encountered and at what ages?

What makes it a "date" anyway?

Answer Question
 
vova

Asked by vova at 10:09 AM on Nov. 21, 2008 in Teens (13-17)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • When I was that age the only difference between hanging out with a boy and a date was that the girl and boy had decided it was a date. We would usually go bowling or what not with a group of friends and never did anything inappropriate, but it seems like things have changed a lot and you hear stories about very young girls getting pregnant or doing crazy things now. There was just something on the news about middle school kids getting caught having sex IN SCHOOL. It's insane.
    sbastille

    Answer by sbastille at 10:12 AM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • I consider a date, When 2 people that like each other. Go to the movies, go out to dinner, go have coffee, or drinks, or other activities. Even inviting over for dinner, or a party.. Most of my ideas for dating are for much older people.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 10:23 AM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • I have sons so I can't speak for a parent of a girl. But for us a date means..When you drive and have your own job to pay for said date then ~ it's a date. Our joke was it's not a date if Mommy has to take you or pick you up....LOL. When they were 13-15 they would "hang out" with their friends. They would all meet at the movies or the bowling alley. My boys are now 17 and 15. One dates and the other still "hangs out" : )
    happy2bme7

    Answer by happy2bme7 at 12:00 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • WHEN I WAS YOUNGER WE DID CONSIDER THEM A DATE. BUT WHEN I GOT TO THE ACTUAL DATING AGE (16) MY DEFINITION OF A DATE CHANGED TO A GUY ACTUALLY PICK ME UP IN HIS OWN CAR AND PAYS WITH HIS OWN MONEY.
    BUT WHEN YOU'RE AROUND 13 YOU ARE IN A HURRY TO GROW UP AND WANT EVERY LITTLE THING TO BE MORE MATURE.
    sassy_brizzy

    Answer by sassy_brizzy at 2:37 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • So far my 8th grader has never said DATE but it is common they are "going out" with someone... I just giggle at the wording as that alone has a totally definition what it really means lol
    Mooska

    Answer by Mooska at 3:23 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • I think 13 is a decent age to date, i did it not so much but i still did, some people think that 13yr olds are still to little to understand but trust me they're not and the more you pull them back the more they will want to get away.

    Stacey.x
    happytohelp

    Answer by happytohelp at 11:08 AM on Nov. 22, 2008

  • THIRTEEN IS TOO YOUNG TO DATE. THEY CANNOT UNDERSTAND THE CONSEQUENCES OF THEIR ACTIONS. IT SEEMS LIKE THEY ARE WAY TOO LITTLE TO DO ANYTHING BUT HOLD HANDS AND IT WILL LAST A WEEK. KIDS TODAY ARE DIFFERENT. THIRTEEN YEAR OLDS ARE GIVING BOYS ORAL SEX, YES EVEN THE "NICE GIRLS" AT THIRTEEN. THEY GET WAY TOO FAR WAY TOO FAST. JUST BECAUSE EVERYONE IS DOING IT DOESN'T MAKE IT HEALTHY. PARENTS ARE ALLOWING IT BECAUSE IT LOOKS LIKE LITTLE KIDS, AND THEY ARE, BUT THEY ARE GOING TOO FAR. IT IS A DIFFERENT WORLD. I WOULD MONITOR THOSE BOY PHONE CALLS VERY CLOSELY. KEEP HER BUSY AND START PAYING ATTENTION. THEY ARE DEVELOPING THEIR WHOLE IDEA OF SEXUALITY AND LOVE AT THIS POINT AND THEY NEED MUCH MORE GUIDANCE THAN YOU MIGHT THINK.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:49 AM on Nov. 23, 2008

  • Thirteen is a good age for "sort of dates". Most 13yr olds aren't mature enough now a days to handle being alone in a romantic situation, but their hormones are going to have them thinking about the opposite sex a lot. It is a good time for going to a dance with a boy but meeting there rather than riding together, going to the movies (mall, etc.) in groups that are boy/girl, and things like that.
    What makes it a date? I used to think it was a date when the guy paid, but that is considered a little sexist now. I guess it is a "real" date when the intent is a romantic liasion with just one other person.
    nysa00

    Answer by nysa00 at 4:35 PM on Nov. 23, 2008

  • my 13 yo son took his girlfriend out on a date .it was supervised .they went out to eat and then he took her to a movie .he worked for the money to take her out .the way i see it if they are going to date at that age they need to be surpervised and the guy has to work odd jobs around the house or naberhood to earn the money to do it
    rona503

    Answer by rona503 at 2:01 AM on Dec. 1, 2008

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