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Annoyed...venting...

So...growing up, I was piss poor. Like...barely had food to eat, yada yada yada. I went to college, got my bachelor degree, started working. Met my husband...and now, we're blessed. Not rich...however, we don't have to worry financially. I done this because I didn't want my children to grow up wanting things that I couldn't afford.
My mom, she's a drunk, alcoholic...it's really sad. Well, she called today saying she needs 2500 dollars for "doctor bills". There's nothing wrong with her except she's an addict. Then she proceeds to tell me everything she done while I was younger...so my brother and I wouldn't have to go without.
She left us when I was 14...and haven't seen her since.
I recently redone my living room, and posted pictures to FB. She saw them...calls me and asks how much I spent on the living room. She goes on and on about how I spend all this money knowing (yes, knowing) she needs money.

Now, a few years ago she called me wanting help to stop drinking and pills. My husband offered that we would come and get her, pay for rehab and she could live with us under certain conditions. The agreements were...
1) She would never drink/take pills after rehab.
2) She would attend AA and therapy for her addictions.
3) She would smoke outside.

Other than that, all expenses would be paid for by us.

I'm so fucking fed up with her. She's 53, soon to be 54...it's really sad.

Answer Question
 
Chloesmom1126

Asked by Chloesmom1126 at 12:48 PM on Mar. 4, 2011 in Relationships

Level 20 (8,269 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • wow i totaly understand my mom was like that she ran away when i was 3... i feel like she needs to grow up you dont owe her anything she is an adult and if she needs money she needs to get a job that can help her pay for it... i hope this doesnt come across rude jus my opinion
    kylansmommy09

    Answer by kylansmommy09 at 12:54 PM on Mar. 4, 2011

  • I know you love your mom but, no way, she abandoned you and your brother, sorry no forgetting, Forgiving yes , but she is a grown woman, she can do it herself
    stella73

    Answer by stella73 at 12:54 PM on Mar. 4, 2011

  • Don't feed into her guilt trip she is trying to put you through. I'm sorry she couldn't be a better mother to give you a life you deserved.
    sweetpea1217

    Answer by sweetpea1217 at 12:58 PM on Mar. 4, 2011

  • sounds a lot like someone I know.
    I know it sounds heartless. but everything I've studies and heard from the professionals is that often you need to let them hit rock bottom before they will help themselves.
    Even then they may not.

    I'd look into support groups and worry about you and your own kids. You can still be worried about your mom, but I would never give her money. we both know where it will probably end up.
    ItsMe89

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 1:14 PM on Mar. 4, 2011

  • I would not give her any money, and I would not listen to her rant about what you spend money on. I'd tell her my finances are none of her business and disconnect the call if she continued.
    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 1:44 PM on Mar. 4, 2011

  • First off DO NOT send her money because she will use it for drugs and alcohol and you will just be feeding her habbit and as far as her raising you and your brother she should have she had you to and you should not feel guilty for having nice things and she has nothing remember she CHOSE this life this life didn't chose her.
    She doesn't want to change she just wants your money and giving you up at a critical age of 14 is unaccepable too she was just thinking about her and her own needs and not you. Your a great person you have a good job an great husband and if she don't wan to come stay with you and have ruls and enroll in rehab then she isn't serious about change she just see's dollar signs...Be strong Honey you have come a long way and you should be proud of yourself. I am and I don't even know you
    dusty1962

    Answer by dusty1962 at 7:35 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

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