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7 Bumps

Mother in law moving in...step daughter wont move out

i know this probably sounds odd so let me explain.
My mother in law fell and broke her hip. she is in her 80's so this isnt that surprising really. Her 2 wks stay in rehab is over and will be moving in with us. NOT a problem. we get along great and she has a blast teaching my preschooler (retired teacher with a masters degree)
My step daughter is 27 and wont move out. she moved in as a transiet...waiting on her mother to finish moving from one house to another so that she can take the old one. she now doesnt want to leave my home...i mean hell why would she leave...free living and free food.
Is it wrong for me to want her out? I am sick of cleaning up after her and even her father wants her to move on. I hate the way she speaks to him sometimes...i dont want my young children to think it is ok to talk to their father like she does. She yells at my children, even went as far as spanking my 2 yr old for peeing in her big girl undies...that only happened once...i warned her to NEVER do it again or she will really see the anger of a southern woman.When my little one had 106 fever she thought she would be helpful and give her a bath...ok except she ran the water cold...i mean straight from the lines cold...did i mention it was single digits outside so you can imagine how cold the water was. I grab my little one and set her aside, knowing that the water could send her into shock...i turn some hot water on and she argues with me...im like HELLO i have kids you dont i know what i am doing you dont...she picks my 2 yr old up and drops her into the tub making her slip and smack her bottem then proceeded to splash her with the freezing water. I very very calmly told her to exit the bathroom before i did somthing i may regret.
she does things like carry the dog by his hindlegs then wonders why he yelps...
if she cleans she just sweeps everything into a pile in the middle of the floor...
i cant even remember the last time she showered...
i cant have her trying to overrule my authority...i am the one that has to learn the therapy for my mother in law, to learn to give her the shots she needs...not her...i know she is going to try and take over but am I wrong to finally put my foot down and say NO?
sound off please and tell me what you think

 
LadyOsgood

Asked by LadyOsgood at 11:49 AM on Mar. 5, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 13 (1,044 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (18)
  • If I were you, she'd already be gone. You are a lot more restrained than me, I'll tell you that. This woman is BAD NEWS for you and your whole family. There is no reason for your kids to have to be around her, let alone you and your DH! I get that she's his DD or whatever, but she's a grown woman! AND she has no respect for either of you OR your children! Have a serious talk with your DH and come to an agreement about when she HAS to be gone by, then stick to it. If she does not move, set all her things outside at the end of that particular day and change the locks! I really hope you can get this situation under control. You sound like a very caring and nice person, and I hate to see people like you taken advantage of. Good luck, Mama!
    lovingmy4babies

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 1:01 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • Her ass would have been gone a long time ago from my house. Tell her it's time to go. She's taking advantage of your generosity. Just tell her that her house is ready & go.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:52 AM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • oh man that girl would either have her stuff on the front lawn, or i'd make her pay rent up the ying yang where she'd WANT to get out. i'm surprised you haven't smacked her yet. especially with the bath thing. that girl would'a been black and blue with some bald spots on her head. seriously. she needs to leave.
    armywife43

    Answer by armywife43 at 11:54 AM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • is there something wrong with her? I mean is she mentally challenged or on drugs? Yes, she needs to move out.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:03 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • u must have a great big kind heart. all of these things would never fly with me..not in a million years. i don't know how you do it. and no u are not wrong. if i were in your should i would manually put her out of my house.
    gwen20

    Answer by gwen20 at 11:54 AM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • i was just gonna tell you that. give her a date she HAS to move out by. IF she doesnt move out change the locks...even after she moves out change the locks. Im sorry but why is a 27 y. o. taking ad vantage of her father like that. I would be embaressed if i was living with my family muching off them. She needs to grow up. You ahve every right to be mad, its your house not here's they are your children not her's she has got to step off! youve gotta put your foot down with her both you and ur husband be firm!
    proudmom611

    Answer by proudmom611 at 12:19 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • Are you kidding me?? I'd have put her in the hospital as soon as she laid a hand on my child. *stuffs her Momma Bear back in it's box* Seriously though this woman is a danger to you and your family. She really needs to go, last month. I strongly suggest you change the locks when you get rid of her too. Change the security code on your alarm system, if you have one, as well.

    I've always been told that if a child's fever gets above 104 degrees they need to go to the ER immediately. Yes, you can try to bring down the fever at home with a bath, but for a temp that high lukewarm water is best. Like you said frigid water could have sent your daughter into shock, maybe even killed her.
    Rosehawk

    Answer by Rosehawk at 12:31 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • Decide on a date that she has to leave. If she doesn't budge, call the cops.
    Simplicity3

    Answer by Simplicity3 at 11:54 AM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • She would have been gone in my house but if I were you, discuss this with your husband, lay down the line and tell if she crosses it, she's out period/point blank.
    tirelessefforts

    Answer by tirelessefforts at 12:02 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • She'd only done one of those things one time in my house before she would have been gone. Kick her out. She is using you and her dad, she's lazy, she's mean, she's a loser.
    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 12:36 PM on Mar. 6, 2011