Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

I really hate her.....

so i had a baby with my ex....he cheated on me so i left him when i was 4 months pregnant and got with another guy that iv wanted to date for a while, my ex goes out and starts dating this girl that lives 2 hours away from him, so i thought it was nothing, she moves back up closer to him, then when my daughter was a new born my ex came and signed everything, she wasnt there but hus friends were but as soon as he left the room he started texting her, i wouldnt let him hold my daughter when he came in, so a couple weeks pass and he comes and sees the baby and leaves an hour later, 3 more weeks pass its summer time its about 100 degrees outside and he wants to meet at the park so he can see his daughter...i see her walking up with him with a pop sickle and a soda in her hand (it pissed me off for some reason), then i start talking to her on myspace and facebook and got to know her shes nice and everything but i dont like her still, then august comes and i text her and ask where they were at the rockin Wednesday we have in the park, shes being nice and all, then since i dont like big crowds we left after letting him see his daughter for a few minutes, now for some reason she thinks she can look at the messages i send my ex, and shes all pissy because i told him not to come around anymore, and i text her a couple weeks ago telling her to tell him to sign over full custody, and she says back "he wants to be in his daughters life just told him not to come around anymore and so has your mom and your brother and sister he's just trying not to start drama between everyone again" i never said anything back to her.....on april 2nd is my new boyfriends sister in laws baby shower i found out she and my ex are invited and that SHES PREGNANT!!!! i dont want my daughter to be related to that bitches kid, that means no matter what i do that my daughter will be around her.....i know why i hate her.....and it hurts to think like this....but when my daughter looks at her she smiles and my ex's girlfriend smiles back....i hate her because i know for a fact shes a better mom then i am, shes not a mom yet but i know she knows more then i do and it scares me, i dont want my daughter to call her mommy, and idk how to tell her that, im not sure how my ex will handle that since i let my daughter call someone else daddy......i have a hate for her so deep i dont know how to get passed it

sorry this is so long i just needed to get it off my chest

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:06 PM on Mar. 5, 2011 in General Parenting

Answers (32)
  • Sounds like you need to grow up!! You left your boyfriend and then got mad he dated someone?? Then you told him not be a part of your daughter's life because you didn't like the girl he was dating, now you don't want your daughter to get to know her dad or her sibling?? I think you really need to reevaluate what's important and figure out a way for your daughter to have a relationship with the rest of her family.


    Answer by skittles1108 at 2:12 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • Awww. Hugs !!!!

    Maybe he will sign the papers, and you can move on for good. Are you still with the man
    that you left her daddy for? I hope so, hope you don't have to do this alone.

    Answer by khf22 at 2:12 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • I'm sorry :( I hope it helps to vent... but instead of focusing on the negitive just realize that you got a bad cheating man out of your life. You should thank her lol *hugs*

    Answer by June_Mama09 at 2:13 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • Wow.  It sounds to me like you are letting your insecurities get in the way.  She may be a better mother to her OWN child but she will NEVER be a better mother to YOURS.  Give yourself some credit for starters. 


    Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 2:15 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • but i feel stupid for leaving him because he never did anything to me other then cheat on me.....i see everyone talking about how he goes to every doctors appointment with her and has never cheated on her, i told him to never be around me when i was pregnant...he came to one appointment and that was to hear the heart beat and after that i cut him out

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:16 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • Well you chose to have a baby with someone and when you do there is a risk of splitting up, especially when youre young and you sound young. I dont particularly like the fact my ex moved in with his mistress he was cheating on me with, or the FACT she tried to help him keep my son from me and had my son call her mommy for 8 mths while they didnt allow me to visit, but you know what? Oh well. He is 10 now and he knows who his mom is and your child will know who mom is too. Believe me keeping your child from its father for petty reasons will come back to bite you squarely on the ass. Either he will get a lawyer and get custody, or your child will resent you when it finds out you kept them from their father.

    Answer by gemgem at 2:16 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • I can understand your negative feelings towards your ex and his new girlfriend but in all honesty, him cheating on you is not a good reason to keep his child from him.
    He wronged you, be angry with him for that, of course. But he didn't do anything to deserve having his child taken away from him.

    It sounds to me like he's trying to keep the peace by not getting everyone all rattled up and that his girlfriend is sticking up for him and working to have his daughter be a part of his life.

    As difficult as it is(and believe me I know) your daughter deserves to know her father. He may not deserve it, but she certainly does. You have to put your own feelings aside and do what's best for your daughter and keeping her from her dad just because YOU are mad at him isn't what's best.

    Answer by Laila-May at 2:17 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • He cheated on you! WTF! That is DAAAAAAAAAMAGE !!!!!!! Come on now...really, just push him out of your mind.
    He may be the daddy of your baby but that is all. .......

    Answer by khf22 at 2:18 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • I can understand you being mad at yourself but don't take it out on your child.  I'm sorry but that's exactly what your doing.  Your pissed off and then don't want your daughter to have anything to do with them.  I don't think your stupid for leaving him.  Just because he wants to be there for his kids doesn't make him a good boyfriend.  Theres a lot more to it then that. 


    Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 2:19 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • gemgem the funny thing is the girl he cheated on me with isnt even the girl he's with now

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:19 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.