Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Respect from a 4 year old...

My 4yo DS is getting quite the sass mouth on him and my 18 month old DD is mimicking his behavior. SO basically I have two sassy back talkers the show me no respect.

I'm at a loss for what to do. I try to model the behavior I want them to have. I am polite and respectful to them, but I also have rules and expectations.

They used to be so well behaved and had good manners. The manners are still there but the amount of back talking that happens and the constant power struggles are wearing me out.
I'm a single mom so I don't have anyone backing me up.

I give time outs, I take away privileges but nothing seems to work. How can I get my kids(mainly my son because DD will follow suit) to listen to me and respect me?

I am beyond frustrated.

 
Laila-May

Asked by Laila-May at 2:32 PM on Mar. 5, 2011 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 19 (6,845 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • That's normal for kids to suddenly pick up on behavior like that. Although super frustrating and irritating for you it can be turned around. It's great that you model good manners, but that doesn't always do the trick as you've noticed. Be consistant with your punishment. Everytime the little one mimics the older make sure you're firm about not repeating what he says. Make sure when you address the older child you let him know that, that isn't tolerated. That if he continues that he'll have no privlages. And I mean it take everything away for a couple of days. Toys, videos, games, etc. He'll get the hint and he'll turn around quick.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 2:38 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • It seems you are doing all you can. I would just be consistent with the time outs. I know they have worked for my son. I think it is all a phase the children go through. My son is 5 and he will sass back quick. It can be frustrating but you have to just keep saying this is not acceptable. Have you tried a behavior chart? We use stickers and a reward system. Always praise for good behavior. Seeing the stickers makes them feel proud they are working towards being good. As a reward take her to the playground etc. Hopefully in time she will want to get the positive reactions from you instead of the negative.
    Kellyjude1

    Answer by Kellyjude1 at 2:40 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • just remember consistency is the key. if you have let bad behavior slide before, he's going to remember it and not take you seriously the next time. also, remember to pick your battles.
    tnm786

    Answer by tnm786 at 2:41 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • Oh my goodness! If you figure it out will you share with me? My daughter will be 4 in a few days and there are moments where I just want to pound her face in from all the mouth and attitude I get from her. I don't really have any advice for you, but I CAN empathize because I'm right there with you.
    Rosehawk

    Answer by Rosehawk at 3:16 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • TEACH HIM don' t punish him. Show them respect and they will show you respect. They learn by imitation but you already know that since your dd is imitating your son. Now show them how to act and they will do it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:38 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • I AM ALSO A SINGLE MOM BUT MY KIDS ARE 18 AND 9 BUT MY SON IS THE 9 YEAR OLD AND HAS A MOUTH ON HIM ALSO...SO WHAT I DO IS GET FIRM AND STRICT WITH HIM WHEN I TALK TO HIM AND HE STARTS TO CALM DOWN BUT JUST TRY PUTTING HIM IN HIS ROOM ALONE OR SITTING ON THE COUCH UNTIL HE CAN BEHAVE...IT MIGHT WORK BUT ALL KIDS ARE DIFFERENT...GOOD LUCK
    lena695

    Answer by lena695 at 3:38 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • Do you give in on your punishments, Like when they cry so much to get out the punish chair or whatevr you punishment may be. Or do you feel sorry for him and let him up you know like things like that just give in. If so he will never learn hes going to take you as a joke. so i would contiue to stay firm with you punishments and dont let the cuteness fool you.
    BUTTERFLY463

    Answer by BUTTERFLY463 at 10:59 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • It seems you are doing all you can. I would just be consistent with the time outs. I know they have worked for my son. I think it is all a phase the children go through. good luck
    Christmaslver68

    Answer by Christmaslver68 at 8:35 AM on Mar. 6, 2011

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN