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5 Bumps

Bullying drama with 8 yr old-hard to get the full story cuz son lies/doesn't admit fault-HELP!!!!!!

My 8 yr old son has had issues being bullied at the bus stop off and on...sometimes he's bullied, sometimes he's not. One of his biggest issues that he has is he has a HUGE MOUTH...it manifests in school as talking in class...we suspended him for 2 days so hopefully it works. He has a "class clown" personality and likes to have people laugh at him...but he doesn't always know when to turn it off. Example is sometimes he'll smile at adults when they're being serious and has a hard time stopping smiling, he likes to "trick" mom by turning off lights when I'm showering, etc. Makes him fun but has a down side too. I talked to our downstairs neighbor and there is a kid in the 6th grade who he says picks on him. When we talked to the kids mom, she says the school counselor told her that my son was threatening to "jump" the kid with his friends...I had a hard time believing it cuz he's small for his age...my son claims this kid is picking on him. Other kids saw this kid throw an egg on my car and there was an incident in school where kid punched someone and my son kicked him and got a referral for it. I don't always get the full story from my son, so I don't know how much of the "bad guy" he is in this situation. I am not one of those parents, however, who feels like my kid is an angel, though I have learned from my 18 yr old steppunk (long story) and working with kids that a brat is NOT something I have any patience for, and when I say brat I mean a kid who is spoiled and is never told "no." btw....Any insight or suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks!

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purplerobin

Asked by purplerobin at 10:33 PM on Mar. 5, 2011 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 19 (6,416 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Have you sat down with his teachers yet? They would be the first to know about your sons behavior and who he hangs out with. It's good you're taking a look at this now while he's young if he is being a bully or just a smart mouth. My youngest son was the same way. A practical joker, I had to set him down on MANY occassions and talk to him about when it was appropriate to act out. He's 20 now and still likes to joke around but he's learned over the yrs. when it's o.k. and when it's not.
    Kathy675

    Answer by Kathy675 at 10:52 PM on Mar. 5, 2011

  • Size does NOT matter when it comes to bullying, and the term 'jump' generally refers to a group of children beating the crap out of one kid, so again- size does not matter. It's important to talk to the other adults , the teachers, the parents. See if any have witnessed any of this first hand. Talk with the school counselor to see what they have seen/been told and how you can work with them to ensure that your son isn't taking the fall for something he ISN'T doing,and if he IS, how you can go about guiding him in the right direction. I'm betting it's nothing, but it's better to know.
    ethans_momma06

    Answer by ethans_momma06 at 7:26 AM on Mar. 6, 2011

  • Like hell it doesn't matter!! If my son was bigger, those brats at the bus stop would leave my son alone!!
    purplerobin

    Comment by purplerobin (original poster) at 12:19 PM on Mar. 6, 2011

  • It sounds to me like there is more to the story than you know... Your son most likely has done more than he admits to. I would sit with him and explain that they only way you can help him is if he is TOTALLY honest with you, and that he will not get into trouble for telling you the truth.
    KTMOM

    Answer by KTMOM at 12:02 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • ahh big mouth syndrome! my ten yr old step daughter has it to!! The thing to adress is your childs perception of whats happening. kids have a very narrow egocentric view of life that makes things hard to decypher. He might beleive he is being bullied,and all in turn to make it sound worse he might stretch the truth. Kids his age can be ruthless. Find out what he thinks is going on make sure he understands the reality of his actions and what jumping a kid could do. You may need to get in touch with thi kid from the bus stop and his parents and sit them down to.
    mislis

    Answer by mislis at 2:11 PM on Mar. 25, 2011

  • Was this exact question asked before?
    dancer

    Answer by dancer at 2:22 PM on Mar. 25, 2011

  • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isfn4OxCPQs


     


    Just because your kid is smaller doesn't mean he is innocent in all of the troubles.

    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 2:25 PM on Mar. 25, 2011

  • I am perfectly aware of that, SleepingBeautee. If you had read the question a bit more carefully you'd know that. I don't have a "he's my son therefore he's an angel" syndrome. By contrast, when I taught preschool and he was in one of the classrooms I worked in, many times I'd have LESS patience with my own kid!
    purplerobin

    Comment by purplerobin (original poster) at 3:59 PM on Mar. 25, 2011

  • that video looks as if the smaller kid is trying to give himself a fighting chance...which is what I sense is happening with my son. Also his teacher/ vice principal seems to think he's trying to find his "pecking order" socially and is using his mouth as a way to do so. My son is in the 10th percentile on growth charts for height/weight and because he's bright academically he started kindergarten at age 4, so he's younger than most kids in his class. Dancer this question was not asked before, just asked a couple weeks ago.
    purplerobin

    Comment by purplerobin (original poster) at 4:03 PM on Mar. 25, 2011

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