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How can I get the picures and voices out of my head? Help me please!

Ok here goes. My dh family has said some mean and hurtful things to me that I cannot get out of my head which leads to pictures. From the time we were engaged, the day before the wedding, and now that we are married, I've heard "I thought you (my dh) would never get married because you use to F*** the ink off of your mattress. "Damn, where did you find this one from".. " Damn cuz, I thought you was going to be a hoe all of your life".
I mean come on ladies, what the f***! Yet my dh does defend us. He tells me that when he was a teenager, he had a lot of female friends. And by him having a lot of female friends many people thought he was sleeping with these females.
On another note I think I have heard it so much that I don't want to have sex with him. Any suggestions??

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 6:56 PM on Nov. 21, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Quit going around them and when they ask why tell them they are going to shut the f*** up about things like that or ya'll will quit keeping contact.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:00 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • It sounds to me like they are jealous and just trying to cause strife between the two of you. My mom used to say that if you let them see it bothers you they will continue to say/do it. They are ignorant ppl imo and you should ignore ignorance if at all possible. How do you get the images out? Don't let them in to begin with. It's just words from ignorant ppl trying to hurt you. These are sad and pathetic ppl who do this to hurt you.

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:04 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • Tell that that his past is really none of your business and you feel it is disrespectful for them to keep brining it up. Everyone makes mistakes, why should they have to relive them. I can understand about the images in your head though. I've been going through the same thing with DH's ex and his family and just TMI in general for the last five years and I am sick of it. DH and I have agreed to not bring her up unless it is directly relating to his child with her, and if his family bothers to bring her up I am going to tell them that the ex and I discussed it and we would both rather that my husband's past be left in the past.
    Ultimatley though, you just have to get over it and do your best to not let it eat away your sanity.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:10 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • Trust is what matters. It is his past and rather or not he did it is know one's business but his. As long as he has been faithful to you, that is what matters. I had the same problem. Only I was the one being accused. To hear the people talk i was sleeping with the whole neighborhood. I was always with his mom or at home with my kids. I use to talk on the CB radio. There was a girl on there who was prostituting and using my cb handle. I was told she even sounded like me. One day there was a fire. My DH went down to check it out and was talking to the girl and found out she talks on the cb. when asked what her handle was she gave mine. He said no your not. And she argued with him until he said "That's my wife and your not pregnant and she is* As long as you trust him and have no reason not to believe in him just tell them that's his past not yours, you don't want to hear it.

    Answer by Xee at 7:33 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • Honey it is what it is, whatever did or didn't happen was in the past. You have got to let it go. all emotions are connected to thoughts and most thoughts are either about the past or an imagained future. If you don't want to continue to have the emotions that these thoughts put in your head then choose to not have the thoughts. You do have a choice. the next time you start to have one of these thoughts tell yourself I don't want to have this thought I don't like the emotions connected to it and I don't like how they make me feel. Then picture yourself taking the thought and throwing it away, I visualize a trash can that I put my unwanted thoughts in. I know this sounds crazy but it honestly works. Give it a try and good luck.

    Answer by norbert at 7:51 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • They sound horribly trashy, yuck. Who DOES that? Tell your husband how uncomfortable they make you feel, not matter how much you trust him. He should be able to take care of the situation. Good luck!

    Answer by KatieCrandall at 8:52 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • It is the past. You are his future. Need I say more. Tell em to eff off or something of the sorts.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:43 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

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