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i have troubled feeling towards my 32 months old son, please HELP, its urgent!

i wanted this baby so much, . but now, feelings have changed, i feel that he is powerful than i am , i become scared when he wakes up crying at night, and i look at him with disgust in the morning IF he woke up crying so loud, i hate taking him out with me, and i feel he is so burden on me.however, i am taking a good care of him, from A to Z and i do it perfectly, he is so smart i tought him the english letters he read 6 or 7 of them, he learned english besides his origin language, knows 50 words by heart, he is very healthy,he is not naughty at all, so polite and neat, he is active, he entertains himself, so happy boy. BUT it's me who is wrong, i am so harsh on him, i shout alot at him, i punish him alot, and i don't give enough love or hugs , even smiles i rarely smile to him. but i play & sing for him and i make him laugh out loud everynight, but i don't love him,wats wrong?

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pinkduck

Asked by pinkduck at 8:03 PM on Nov. 21, 2008 in General Parenting

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • You should seek counseling ASAP
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:04 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • Have you considered that you're depressed and its not actually about him? I would suggest talking to a professional.
    Ginger0104

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 8:06 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • Did you have postpartum depression? I was the opposite, when he was smaller I didn't trust anyone with him and cried cuz I was afraid something would happen to him. Mention it to your doctor that you are having feelings you can't control and (sorry to say but ) inappropriate thoughts.
    BubbysMom208

    Answer by BubbysMom208 at 8:09 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • Postpartum depression can happen this late. You could have had it for awile and not known it. The best thing is that you can ackowledge that something is wrong with yourself. PLEASE seek theorpy. There is nothing wrong with talking to someone about your problem. They will be able to help you overcome it before you act upon your feelings/emotions.
    kscmbz

    Answer by kscmbz at 8:14 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • its me again.. i don't think its postpartum, because i have a second baby, he is 7 months now, and i don't have those troubled feelings towards, its the opposite .i love him so much, he is calm and rarely caries, but i don't give the attention to every new and (first time) little things he does as he grows up, because all my time goes to the older one. ! !
    pinkduck

    Answer by pinkduck at 8:24 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • I m so sorry you are feeling this way. I think that you are feeling overwhelmed. I know that I have felt that alot with my 2 year old and my 4 month old. Some mornings I just hear my 2 year old crying and I almost want to just get back under the covers and go back to sleep. I love them both very much though. Can you imagine how this is going to affect both your children. Try to get help. It could still be Postpartum depression. Talk to a doctor, or counselor, just talk to someone soon. Good luck.
    bellasrose71008

    Answer by bellasrose71008 at 8:40 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • Please go talk to your doctor. It is not normal to have these feelings. There is more to raising a child than teaching them. You do not need to go thru this alone. Talk to your doctor and think about medication. Please email be privatley if you need to talk about this. I have been thru this before. You are not a bad person!
    Ikette

    Answer by Ikette at 10:17 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • Talk to a therapist.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:04 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • i agree with everyone on here. this might be something that can be fixed. you NEED to talk to your doctor. just think that your doctor might be able to help you fix this. then you might be able to enjoy your children more. that is SOOO worth it! lots of moms have issues like this. doctors are used to it and they will know what to do to help. do it now because once you get help you will wish you had done it sooner!
    AliMom714

    Answer by AliMom714 at 11:09 PM on Nov. 21, 2008

  • Some people can't show love at all and sometimes that stems from their homelife as a child. You know something is wrong here, and you know it needs to be fixed. Instead of shouting at him at the onset, why don't you count to 10 to get yourself under control. Children can be very trying and we all know that. Children cannot be perfect, and thats the way of life. You don't sound like you are neglecting him in one way but in another way you are and thats the part that bothers you. I see a lot of parents like you, believe it or not and you aren't alone. So, you do need help if you want to get it, but, no one can make you love your child, that has to come from you. What kind of life do you have with their Dad?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:25 AM on Nov. 22, 2008

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